How to be English, Floral Pees, and Medals of Poverty

Whilst the heavens are currently falling down, what better thing to do than to update you on what's been going on.

So the Bierboerse was on this weekend in Mainz, so Carlitos, Luigi and I headed down there and did our fair share of tasting. A few steak rolls, donuts and sausages later and we're on to the Czech ones.

If it wasn't bad enough that the husbands are pulled along to the garden centres because their wives want to get the latest fashion in plants, but now going to the toilets there is made worse by the fact that they are installing floral urinals. Nothing like mother nature...

Polish migrant workers arriving in Dover are being handed out welcome packs with useful information about how to be English, talk about the weather, not talk about bowel movements when someone asks how you are, and that black tea is not being racist. Maybe one should also distribute these to some of our schools and see if some common sense also gets taught...

In Ghana medals to the value of 1.4 million dollars are being handed out to officials. This is obviously considered better for the country than, say, investing it in shelters or food for the population that lives in poverty. In fact this reminds me of Ethiopia during 1984/5 when Mengistu spent 150 million dollars on tenth anniversary celebrations whilst millions of Ethiopians were starving to death. This tragedy resulted in the Live Aid concerts taking place which raised over a billion dollars, but too late for the thousands of people who already had died. Sometimes people learn from history, sometimes they don't - but we need to learn how to react before it's too late.

Well, back to pulling down the hatches and stopping those storms from coming inside...

Vampiric Carrots and Shed-quarters

So the days go by, you think you're nice and relaxed at home until you wake up one morning and find your furry friend beheaded and all it's blood drained out. Not a very sweet thought I suppose, but that's how people around the Ruhr valley are feeling at the moment. Any rumours of the suspect being 4 inches long and orange are unconfirmed.

Following the theme of being comfy at home, and waking up one day to a surprise, a lady near Banbury also got a shock. She went to her shed and found a man living there, with a makeshift bedroom, TVs etc. Apparently he had been there for about 5 weeks, weeding the garden, potting her plants etc, but she hadn't noticed...

Tonight it's off to Darmstadt to see the Brittos (who, incidentally, are getting married on Sep 6th) and to try one of their local indian restaurants. A beer or two might also be in order...

Keep them cool...

Ingrid Free, Spanish Cup, Energy Snake and Valencian Visit

Something amazing happened this week. After six years of captivity, the presidential candidate for Colombia, Ingrid Betancourt, was freed. This high profile hostage was one of the Farc's best bargaining pieces, but she was rescued by the Colombian army pretending to belong to an NGO without a single shot being fired. Of course one cannot forget the other 14 hostages that were also rescued in the raid. You should really see the video that the BBC has of the raid - very moving. After the loss of many of their leaders, and now this, it is looking ever more likely that their war in Colombia might finally come to an end. Here's hoping...

Not many people predicted what happened in Euro 2008. After a lacklustre game against Italy, they really motivated themselves and managed to play an amazing game against Germany in the final. It really was inspiring how they moved the ball around the pitch with such ease, despite the game being spoilt later on by various bad fouls. You could imagine the noise which took place that night here in Mainz. Well, maybe you can't. As the end result finally sunk in we were making our way by train to the main station. On the platform various Germans started arriving from one of the many public viewings, most wrapped in their national flag, some just sat on the ground and started crying, others coped differently by either attacking the billboards, timetables, glass dividers or trying to shake the poles holding up the roof. We decided not to speak Spanish whilst waiting for the train...

The opening of the waxwork museum in Berlin had a little hiccup, as the wax sculpture of Hitler was beheaded by one of the visitors. One has to remember that in Germany anything to do with him or the Nazi party is strictly forbidden, so the opening wasn't going to be without controversy.

Next time you're swimming in the ocean and think you see something in the dark depths below, don't presume that it's a shark, as it could also be one of the 200m anacondas. No, not real live ones, but rubber ones which are meant to be able to produce a lot of energy from the movements of the water.

Gemma, Victor and Alejandra came over last week for their annual topup of Kebabs, sauerkraut and German culture. Of course any visit isn't complete without a meal at the Eisgrub, where we were also joined by Mar.

Then yesterday was the A4 and friends Summer BBQ. Much meat was eaten, and beer drunk (after being cooled to exactly the right temperature using machinery from the particle detectors...) and the meal was finished off with Nougat from Valencia. Yum!

Stay free..