Dream Job, Deadly Jams, Suicidal Goats and Polite Deaths
Ever wanted to know what your dream job was? I'm sure it involved a lot of money, for little work, in surroundings that you love, doing what you love.
Well then this job might be just up your alley.
Money: 70 thousand pounds. Contract: 6 months. Job Description: Caretaker of one of the islands of Australia's Whitsunday Islands. Includes feeding fish, collecting island's mail, sailing, diving, laying on beach. Not more than 12 hours a month. Now, where did I have my CV...
Next time you see a splodge of jam on the side of a plate, duck for cover. US scientists are investigating exploding marmalade for use in rockets. I think I'm having honey on my crumpets...
The animals of a Canadian zoo are coming to terms with the sad loss of one of their goats. This wasn't just any loss, but the goat apparently was found hanging from a noose within it's enclosure. The penguins are currently investigating the circumstances surrounding it.
A new theory is being suggested as to why so many Britons died on the Titanic when it sunk. The politeness of the British was apparently the reason why they made sure the others were out of harm's way before thinking about themselves. I think I would also want to check the percentage of British on board first, as a majority would also explain it quite reasonably.
Missing those great old steam locomotives? Then head down to Darlington where a the first steam engine to be built in nearly 50 years is currently running passengers around England. You can just taste that smoke going into your lungs...hold on, isn't it a no-smoking train?
Did you use to phone up people asking if they are really mr so-and-so, and sniggering when they confirm it? Well, feel for people like that who have rude names in their addresses. Some of them get refused deliveries and turn red when trying to explain to people that their address really does have those words in it. Makes those old prank phonecalls seem tame in comparison...
Now let's check out this address on the GPS...
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Pretty In Pink, The Truth Behind Smut
As the temperatures plummet, water pipes freeze, the roads become ice rinks, and everything is covered in a blanket of snow, sometimes one just wants to be a child again. Snowball fights, building snowmen, making yeti footprints and coming home frozen to the bone with snow coming out of your ears. Ah, the good old days...
Want an experience that Charles Darwin didn't get? Then head over to the Galapagos islands and check out the pink iguana. Yes, this fashion statement of a creature avoided Darwin's travels and has remained until recently a mystery. Looks to me like it forgot to put it's coat on...
What's green, slimy and flies? The new algae-burning Boeing 737 that's doing test runs around Texas. Using algae it doesn't create a shortage of foodstuffs in the third world. Whether the fish start complaining about their food reserves going down is yet to be seen.
If you're in the business of paying for pleasure (and I don't mean a game of monopoly) then you might want to read what the UK government are currently trying to pass through law without actually having thought it through properly. Of course this is not new, many laws are passed without even looking at the facts. If it's hyped enough, and a splattering of key words are used, then people will think they're stopping something bad, when in fact they could be affecting many things that are not bad at all. Read the article to get a lowdown on exactly what it entails. When will facts and statistics actually be used properly in politics?
Following on from the banks and auto industry, the sex industry in the US also wants a government bailout. They believe that with the current economic situation, fewer people will be enjoying the X-rated services offered by said companies. If you believe the US should pay to support it's pleasure palaces, then write to your congressman now...
Sticking to the US, ever wondered how the statistics look like on what topics Bush has been talking about and how the trends developed over time? Then have a look at this article, showing how terror, taxes, health, and jobs have fared over the last eight years.
Lots of weird things happen over the new year. Resolutions are made and broken, prices go up, it gets cold. Well, obviously someone had a bit of spare time on his hands and set about declaring his love from the rooftop of a carpet store. Whether he's trying to tell all the google earth viewers, or some local pilots is yet to be found out.
After 80 years, Winnie the Pooh is set to come back to the bookshelves with a new sequel approved by the estates of the original authors. Whether the honey still tastes as good, or piglet falls in love is of course a secret. You'll just have to read it yourselves...
Keep those heaters running...
As the temperatures plummet, water pipes freeze, the roads become ice rinks, and everything is covered in a blanket of snow, sometimes one just wants to be a child again. Snowball fights, building snowmen, making yeti footprints and coming home frozen to the bone with snow coming out of your ears. Ah, the good old days...
Want an experience that Charles Darwin didn't get? Then head over to the Galapagos islands and check out the pink iguana. Yes, this fashion statement of a creature avoided Darwin's travels and has remained until recently a mystery. Looks to me like it forgot to put it's coat on...
What's green, slimy and flies? The new algae-burning Boeing 737 that's doing test runs around Texas. Using algae it doesn't create a shortage of foodstuffs in the third world. Whether the fish start complaining about their food reserves going down is yet to be seen.
If you're in the business of paying for pleasure (and I don't mean a game of monopoly) then you might want to read what the UK government are currently trying to pass through law without actually having thought it through properly. Of course this is not new, many laws are passed without even looking at the facts. If it's hyped enough, and a splattering of key words are used, then people will think they're stopping something bad, when in fact they could be affecting many things that are not bad at all. Read the article to get a lowdown on exactly what it entails. When will facts and statistics actually be used properly in politics?
Following on from the banks and auto industry, the sex industry in the US also wants a government bailout. They believe that with the current economic situation, fewer people will be enjoying the X-rated services offered by said companies. If you believe the US should pay to support it's pleasure palaces, then write to your congressman now...
Sticking to the US, ever wondered how the statistics look like on what topics Bush has been talking about and how the trends developed over time? Then have a look at this article, showing how terror, taxes, health, and jobs have fared over the last eight years.
Lots of weird things happen over the new year. Resolutions are made and broken, prices go up, it gets cold. Well, obviously someone had a bit of spare time on his hands and set about declaring his love from the rooftop of a carpet store. Whether he's trying to tell all the google earth viewers, or some local pilots is yet to be found out.
After 80 years, Winnie the Pooh is set to come back to the bookshelves with a new sequel approved by the estates of the original authors. Whether the honey still tastes as good, or piglet falls in love is of course a secret. You'll just have to read it yourselves...
Keep those heaters running...
Sunday, January 04, 2009
New Year's Resolutions
Yes, those things that everybody makes and after about 4 days breaks. The promises that make us feel better just because we have thought of something we're bad at. Well, it's that time of year again, and half of you will be starting new diets, 30% will be giving up smoking, 20% will try to be more forgiving, and 3 people will promise to be vegetarians. So what was your resolution? Answers on the back of a postcard please...
Well the pope has made a change for new year. He's stated that the Vatican will no longer accept the laws of Italy without first considering every single one in much detail. The obvious ones to be ignored will be giving equal rights to homosexuals, abortions, divorce...do they really want to go back to the Spanish inquisition times?
You're a shopkeeper and want the day off over Christmas, but don't want to close the store. What do you do? Well, in north yorkshire a shopowner let customers take the things they wanted and leave their money in a tin for him. Apparently it worked. Although, if the shop had been in any of the neighbouring towns maybe there wouldn't be much left of it (as some of the interviewees in this article mention). I suppose it solves the problem of opening hours, although checking for ID on alcohol might be difficult...
Ever wanted to know what the locals are like? Moving into a new area, visiting on holiday? Wouldn't it be great if you could see if it's a dodgy area, or lots of roadworks, litter etc? Well welcome Google's Streetview, allowing you to see for instance, that in Madrid ladies are forced to urinate in the street. Whether it was an order from the Vatican has yet to be confirmed...
And as we prepare to go back to work after our festivities, what better than to look back at whom we spent them with. This year I must say that New Year in the north of England wouldn't normally be on the top of my list, but getting to do some great excursions, and of course to see my nephew, his parents, and my parents were of course the highlight. Christmas in Wiesbaden was also surprisingly enjoyable. No sauerkraut, no black bread, no lack of humour, just great food, drink, presents, and of course company. So thanks to all of you who made my festive season just that.
Now the weathermen are saying that next week will get down to minus 20 degrees. I really hope they got their decimal point wrong...otherwise we'll be scraping ice of the inside of our windows...
Yes, those things that everybody makes and after about 4 days breaks. The promises that make us feel better just because we have thought of something we're bad at. Well, it's that time of year again, and half of you will be starting new diets, 30% will be giving up smoking, 20% will try to be more forgiving, and 3 people will promise to be vegetarians. So what was your resolution? Answers on the back of a postcard please...
Well the pope has made a change for new year. He's stated that the Vatican will no longer accept the laws of Italy without first considering every single one in much detail. The obvious ones to be ignored will be giving equal rights to homosexuals, abortions, divorce...do they really want to go back to the Spanish inquisition times?
You're a shopkeeper and want the day off over Christmas, but don't want to close the store. What do you do? Well, in north yorkshire a shopowner let customers take the things they wanted and leave their money in a tin for him. Apparently it worked. Although, if the shop had been in any of the neighbouring towns maybe there wouldn't be much left of it (as some of the interviewees in this article mention). I suppose it solves the problem of opening hours, although checking for ID on alcohol might be difficult...
Ever wanted to know what the locals are like? Moving into a new area, visiting on holiday? Wouldn't it be great if you could see if it's a dodgy area, or lots of roadworks, litter etc? Well welcome Google's Streetview, allowing you to see for instance, that in Madrid ladies are forced to urinate in the street. Whether it was an order from the Vatican has yet to be confirmed...
And as we prepare to go back to work after our festivities, what better than to look back at whom we spent them with. This year I must say that New Year in the north of England wouldn't normally be on the top of my list, but getting to do some great excursions, and of course to see my nephew, his parents, and my parents were of course the highlight. Christmas in Wiesbaden was also surprisingly enjoyable. No sauerkraut, no black bread, no lack of humour, just great food, drink, presents, and of course company. So thanks to all of you who made my festive season just that.
Now the weathermen are saying that next week will get down to minus 20 degrees. I really hope they got their decimal point wrong...otherwise we'll be scraping ice of the inside of our windows...
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