Birthday Wishes, Hedgehog Diet, Hidden Irish
So first up it was Olgui's birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday !!! This year's event took place in Havanna (the restaurant) with a fair number of tables being filled by guests. Highlights of the night were the rollos (of which were eaten about 15) and the birthday cake (with chocolate sticks for candles).
Now some people go on diets, then their cats and dogs go on diets, but this is the first time I've heard about a hedgehog having to go on a diet. It apparently weighs over 2 kilos...
Lined up for brain surgery? Maybe it's worth insisting that no Father Ted is shown on the hospital television beforehand. A Yorkshire man woke up from his with a full Irish accent, despite having never been to the country, nor having an relatives from there...
Next time you hear noises late at night have a thought for this lady that now has to appear before court for having breached her ASBO for noisy sex again. There apparently is no proof of the noise except for the neighbours not being able to sleep...
An interesting twist has come to the tale of Israeli oranges that appeared in Iran. Apparently they were faked brand oranges from China...
Finally wanted to get some use from Google Street View? Well how about for checking out the local ladies of the night...
Wrap up well...
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Protective Underwear, Long-distance Loving and despicable parenting
Get nervous when youths enter a shop you are in? Feel intimidated when people start shouting at each other around you? Want to wear a bullet-proof vest but worry you can't disguise it? Well fear no more, all you need is a suitably wired bra, as a woman in Detroit found out. When four robbers trying to escape saw that a woman had been watching them, they fired off a shot at her. This bullet hit the underwiring of her bra and was deflected, not even piercing her skin. Now all we need to do is find something similar men can wear...
Technology can solve everything someone once said. Well, for the people that are a long distance apart yet need the intimacy between them to carry on, scientists have invented such a device that projects the position of one body through light on your own body and allows as such a virtual interaction. However, it's uses are not restricted here, they are also testing a similar device for virtual fighting...
The province of Alberta in Canada might not be well know all over the world, but a brief knowledge of geography and one can normally know that it's a land-locked (shouldn't this be logged?) state. So it was a bit of a surprise when their latest tourist video showed pictures of a family on a beach. Further investigation showed that the picture of the beach was actually from Northumberland in the UK. Well, I suppose the advert helped someone's tourism...
Feeling the pinch of the financial crisis? No longer able to do all things you used to? Feel insecure about how your family is going to survive? So what would you do? Well, hopefully not set off for Italy and then leave your three young children in a pizzeria and go into hiding like this faimly in Germany just did. It beggars belief what some people have for brains...
So a BBQ along the Rhine coming up if the weather holds, great way of sing up those sausages...
Get nervous when youths enter a shop you are in? Feel intimidated when people start shouting at each other around you? Want to wear a bullet-proof vest but worry you can't disguise it? Well fear no more, all you need is a suitably wired bra, as a woman in Detroit found out. When four robbers trying to escape saw that a woman had been watching them, they fired off a shot at her. This bullet hit the underwiring of her bra and was deflected, not even piercing her skin. Now all we need to do is find something similar men can wear...
Technology can solve everything someone once said. Well, for the people that are a long distance apart yet need the intimacy between them to carry on, scientists have invented such a device that projects the position of one body through light on your own body and allows as such a virtual interaction. However, it's uses are not restricted here, they are also testing a similar device for virtual fighting...
The province of Alberta in Canada might not be well know all over the world, but a brief knowledge of geography and one can normally know that it's a land-locked (shouldn't this be logged?) state. So it was a bit of a surprise when their latest tourist video showed pictures of a family on a beach. Further investigation showed that the picture of the beach was actually from Northumberland in the UK. Well, I suppose the advert helped someone's tourism...
Feeling the pinch of the financial crisis? No longer able to do all things you used to? Feel insecure about how your family is going to survive? So what would you do? Well, hopefully not set off for Italy and then leave your three young children in a pizzeria and go into hiding like this faimly in Germany just did. It beggars belief what some people have for brains...
So a BBQ along the Rhine coming up if the weather holds, great way of sing up those sausages...
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Tube Reading, Sexless Ants and Brazilian Lingerie
Whilst the weather can't make up it's mind, why not take the tube to some of London's favourite tourist attractions. Whilst you're about it, pick up a good read. Once a month novels are given outside certain tube stations and can be dropped off once they are read. Makes a change from all those free papers that end up stuck to the bottom of your foot, or lanced at you whilst you walk down Oxford Street...
Remember those science fiction films you saw as a kid (or maybe also as a grown up?) where the villains use cloning to produce their perfect race of soldiers? Well, amazonian ants have started cloning themselves, so they no longer need to mate in order to reproduce. As it's known by all that ants will take over the world someday, surely this is the first wakeup call, that this day is coming soon?...
Considering taking the missus away on a dirty weekend? Well don't think about coming to the UK. A Brazilian woman has been refused entry to Newcastle airport (after also being denied to enter Belfast too after it was found that she had a lot of underwear in her suitcase, but little else. It just goes to show that one should travel without any clothes then...although I bet you'll be turned back for other reasons as well...
Looking for that unusual gift for someone special? Well the new rage in Australia is paper made from wombat poo. Yep, this isn't just any recycling, it's exporting the sewage that one would normally pump out into the sea or bury in land fills. Genius...
The so-called environmental bonus in Germany is under mounting criticism that it's creating scrapyards full of cars that would otherwise have been resold. Cars with less than 20k on the clock, 9 years old, sparkling condition are all being scrapped as the Germans get a bonus off purchase of their new car. Of course this means more people are buying smaller cars now (the bonus is therefore a higher discount) but also, as Germans are used to changing their cars every other year, it's created a surge in scraps which are perfectly ok to drive, and probably not even environmentally worse than the newer ones they buy. It reminds me of a time (1939?) when all metal objects were collected by the government in order for them to make products of their own...
Now for something completely different. You may have asked why are people on the telly always good looking? Why aren't there any not-so-good-looking people that have talent? Well, in Britain's Got Talent a lady named Susan Boyle appeared, astounding critics with her marvelous rendition of Les Miserables, despite coming on stage to jeers and laughs. You have to see this video of it. Very enlightening...
So get your karaoke out and start practicing...
Whilst the weather can't make up it's mind, why not take the tube to some of London's favourite tourist attractions. Whilst you're about it, pick up a good read. Once a month novels are given outside certain tube stations and can be dropped off once they are read. Makes a change from all those free papers that end up stuck to the bottom of your foot, or lanced at you whilst you walk down Oxford Street...
Remember those science fiction films you saw as a kid (or maybe also as a grown up?) where the villains use cloning to produce their perfect race of soldiers? Well, amazonian ants have started cloning themselves, so they no longer need to mate in order to reproduce. As it's known by all that ants will take over the world someday, surely this is the first wakeup call, that this day is coming soon?...
Considering taking the missus away on a dirty weekend? Well don't think about coming to the UK. A Brazilian woman has been refused entry to Newcastle airport (after also being denied to enter Belfast too after it was found that she had a lot of underwear in her suitcase, but little else. It just goes to show that one should travel without any clothes then...although I bet you'll be turned back for other reasons as well...
Looking for that unusual gift for someone special? Well the new rage in Australia is paper made from wombat poo. Yep, this isn't just any recycling, it's exporting the sewage that one would normally pump out into the sea or bury in land fills. Genius...
The so-called environmental bonus in Germany is under mounting criticism that it's creating scrapyards full of cars that would otherwise have been resold. Cars with less than 20k on the clock, 9 years old, sparkling condition are all being scrapped as the Germans get a bonus off purchase of their new car. Of course this means more people are buying smaller cars now (the bonus is therefore a higher discount) but also, as Germans are used to changing their cars every other year, it's created a surge in scraps which are perfectly ok to drive, and probably not even environmentally worse than the newer ones they buy. It reminds me of a time (1939?) when all metal objects were collected by the government in order for them to make products of their own...
Now for something completely different. You may have asked why are people on the telly always good looking? Why aren't there any not-so-good-looking people that have talent? Well, in Britain's Got Talent a lady named Susan Boyle appeared, astounding critics with her marvelous rendition of Les Miserables, despite coming on stage to jeers and laughs. You have to see this video of it. Very enlightening...
So get your karaoke out and start practicing...
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Meat, Sex and Pineapples
According to new research, eating the famous bacon sarnie after going on a bender does actually help to cure your hangover. It wouldn't surprise many of us, however, things like this we have known since the heady days of Selly Oak life. What we're still waiting for is the proof that having a curry at 4am after coming back from a club also helps one to lose weight...
It appears that chimps have finally figured out the meaning of life. The male chimps now know that if they share their portion of meat with the ladies, they get to mate more often than their greedy cousins. Of course there will be nervousness around the hut, with rumours of a "meat for sex" scandal to erupt soon...
So you've come to a foreign country to film a video, and you decide to have a break and go and grab a bite to eat. Who do you leave protecting your expensive camera kit? A security guard? Policeman? Some big bloke who needs the money? Well these japanese decided that leaving some poor guy dressed in a pineapple outfit would be enough. As you can imagine, the camera kit vanished quicker than you could say pineapple juice...
Always on the lookout for great job descriptions, the swedish have decided that they are missing out on claiming tax on people stripping on the web. So some poor guy has to go around visiting all the stripping webcam sites of the internet, checking to see if one of the strippers could be swedish, who he then tries to contact in order to get a name or address so that he can then send off a tax bill to her. Must be a difficult job to find people for...maybe the community could do it for him...
Do your bit...
According to new research, eating the famous bacon sarnie after going on a bender does actually help to cure your hangover. It wouldn't surprise many of us, however, things like this we have known since the heady days of Selly Oak life. What we're still waiting for is the proof that having a curry at 4am after coming back from a club also helps one to lose weight...
It appears that chimps have finally figured out the meaning of life. The male chimps now know that if they share their portion of meat with the ladies, they get to mate more often than their greedy cousins. Of course there will be nervousness around the hut, with rumours of a "meat for sex" scandal to erupt soon...
So you've come to a foreign country to film a video, and you decide to have a break and go and grab a bite to eat. Who do you leave protecting your expensive camera kit? A security guard? Policeman? Some big bloke who needs the money? Well these japanese decided that leaving some poor guy dressed in a pineapple outfit would be enough. As you can imagine, the camera kit vanished quicker than you could say pineapple juice...
Always on the lookout for great job descriptions, the swedish have decided that they are missing out on claiming tax on people stripping on the web. So some poor guy has to go around visiting all the stripping webcam sites of the internet, checking to see if one of the strippers could be swedish, who he then tries to contact in order to get a name or address so that he can then send off a tax bill to her. Must be a difficult job to find people for...maybe the community could do it for him...
Do your bit...
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Sunning it up
So, you've finished looking at the pictures of the Mainz Carnival 2009, and wanting to know what to do? Well, you should have gone down to Colombia in March. Great weather (sun, 35 degrees celsius in Barranquilla), great food (perrito italo-hawaiano, chuzo de pollo desgranado con mazorca, sancocho, arequipe, fritanga...), great music (Santana in concert) so I hope you can understand why I didn't update this blog for a while :)
Anyways, the world has moved on over the last month. The sun has actually come to work part-time in Mainz. Yes, the last couple of days we've had sunny spells, and temperatures rising to 18 degrees! Time to put the winter clothes away and get those shorts back out...
If you're planning on going down to the Black Forest, double check which hotel you've booked into, as one in particular has decided to go naturist. Clothes are completely forbidden. Just make sure you don't order a hot dog...
How to annoy everyone at a political summit? Hold up the starting speech by talking on your phone. That's what Berlusconi decided to do at the NATO summit. I wonder whether the Italians pay his roaming charges...
Get those grills cleaned up, if this keeps up we'll be having a barbie next week :)
So, you've finished looking at the pictures of the Mainz Carnival 2009, and wanting to know what to do? Well, you should have gone down to Colombia in March. Great weather (sun, 35 degrees celsius in Barranquilla), great food (perrito italo-hawaiano, chuzo de pollo desgranado con mazorca, sancocho, arequipe, fritanga...), great music (Santana in concert) so I hope you can understand why I didn't update this blog for a while :)
Anyways, the world has moved on over the last month. The sun has actually come to work part-time in Mainz. Yes, the last couple of days we've had sunny spells, and temperatures rising to 18 degrees! Time to put the winter clothes away and get those shorts back out...
If you're planning on going down to the Black Forest, double check which hotel you've booked into, as one in particular has decided to go naturist. Clothes are completely forbidden. Just make sure you don't order a hot dog...
How to annoy everyone at a political summit? Hold up the starting speech by talking on your phone. That's what Berlusconi decided to do at the NATO summit. I wonder whether the Italians pay his roaming charges...
Get those grills cleaned up, if this keeps up we'll be having a barbie next week :)
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