El Guiri in Oxford (formally Mainz)

Kung Hei Fat Choi

2012-01-31T12:51:00.002Z

Last Sunday marked the end of Chinese New Year celebrations in London for the year of the dragon. Tens of thousands of people descended on London (well, those that didn't already live there) to see the festivities around Chinatown, Shaftesbury Avenue and Trafalgar Square.

The procession went around Chinatown, with the streets packed with crowds vying for a spot to see the dancers and musicians go by. Once they finished the route, people headed off towards Trafalgar Square to see the main stage for the firecrackers, dragon dances and other shows.

The main event was scheduled to start at 12 o'clock (midday), but as people started arriving from Chinatown, it was obvious that if you hadn't got there by 11.40, you weren't going to get a spot where you could see anything.

Luckily we managed to get spots on the stairs, which were elevated from the main floor and the many heads. It must be said that the weather was freezing, definitely below zero, and felt like about -5. Everyone tried to keep themselves warm and busy whilst waiting for the clock to strike 12, and on the dot the presenters came onto the stage.

They then started to introduce the festival committee, which consisted of about 15 people from the UK and China, each with relatively long titles. As each one was introduced, they came to the front of the stage and started to thank every one of the others standing up there with them ,never missing their titles as well.

Once everyone realised that we were in for a long wait before we would actually see anything, people started to leave the area. Not only had they introduced themselves, but then they had to do the painting of the dragon eyes, each minister at a time...

By the time the dragon dances started ,people had been waiting in the freezing cold for over an hour. As you can imagine, they weren't too pleased (those that had stayed - many had already left by now).

The dragon dances were very colourful and skilled, and were great to watch, it was just a pity that the day was let down by the amount of waiting before seeing anything. Next time maybe they will do an introduction between each show, so that at least people can see something before they got frozen and had to leave for home.

Spam, Burns and Retirement

2012-01-28T15:06:00.000Z

We all hate those emails that arrive in our inboxes selling various pills and financial services. The fact that around 90% of all email is now spam, doesn't help matters.

However, this is not what I am wanting to talk about today. No, this is a much more favourable topic, namely SPAMALOT. Yes, we went and saw this theatre production last week (specially discounted tickets made it well worth it).
Based on Monty Python sketches, this production had us in fits of laughter many a time.A musical production, it still managed to keep non-musical lovers content by the sense of humour that MP brought to the world. As such, young children, OAPs, and everyone in between were in the audience enjoying this show.
Heartily recommended!

The 25th of January is celebrated throughout Scotland, but not many people outside of this area actually know the history of Burn's Night, so click on that link to find out more. South of Hadrian's Wall we don't normally celebrate this day, but you do see some related changes around you. For instance, at the local Cornish Pasty shop, they were offering Pasties with Haggis in them. Now this is a weird combination, being a mix of the far north and far south, but it worked surprisingly well.

Also a local pub was offering the traditional Haggis with neeps and tatties, which we just had to try yesterday (didn't we Diego?).
We didn't go the whole hog, however, and left the whisky on the side and opted for a more refreshing pint of Scottish ale. After eating we were accompanied by Eva, Kyle, Elena, Clea (+1), Gaia, Simon, and Irina, filling up the Swan and Castle (ok, just one area of it) and being able to say goodbye to Diego in style before he leaves these shores for those of a French nature.
See you soon !

For those of you who read my last post, went and watched The Artist, and loved it, you will be sad to hear that the dog (Uggie) is set to retire. Yes, after the tiring life of a movie star, he has decided to go off to Florida and spend his days relaxing on the beach, apparently :)
Rumours that he might come out of retirement for a sequel are unfounded, as he has not been offered the amount of dog food that he is demanding.

Bogota reached the news spectacularly the other day, as it was amongst the top 15 cities for business according to Fortune Magazine. Some positive publicity like this definitely does wonders for th country's image, so lets hope things keep on going this way.Well, celebrations tomorrow in London for the Chinese New Year, so hopefully have some great photos to put up soon.

Always look on the bright side of life !

Now for something different

2012-01-23T08:22:00.000Z

Sometimes it's difficult to find the time and possibility to get out of the run-of-the-mill day. Over the past week we made the effort, and had the luck of having interesting opportunities turn up on our door.

We saw The Artist the other day, which although I believe it's a great film, well thought through, and interesting throughout, I don't think we're going to see an emergence of lots more silent black and white films in the future, there's too many people brought up on just computer generated films that they won't be seeing this film, unless it's shown at school. But for the rest of you - go and see it, well worth the visit, even if you haven't liked silent or black and white films in the past.

Last Sunday we headed off to London with a short list of things we would try to do. We wanted to see if we could get in to see the Leonardo exhibition at the National Gallery, get discounted tickets for an afternoon performance of Cirque du Soleil's Totem, and depending on the weather, go around some of the famous sights taking pictures with my new camera (see previous post "Oxford Shooting").

The weather couldn't have been any better. Slightly fresh, but very sunny and not a cloud in the sky. We got on our early train to find that it's heating system wasn't working, so spent the whole journey (luckily only an hour) with hat, coat and gloves on. Arriving at the National Gallery at 10.30am we went to the ticket desk to ask about tickets to the Leonardo exhibition. The lady was a bit surprised that we would ask such a question at this time of the day (the box office had only been open 30 mins). Apparently people had been queuing since 5.30am to get a ticket for later in the same day. Pleased that we didn't freeze for four and a half hours outside to see pictures on tiptoes in a huge crowd of people, we set off to some of the other works in the gallery, which were also quite nice.

Exiting the building onto Trafalgar Square, it was the perfect moment to start taking some photos of such landmarks as Nelson's Column, Westminster, and the fountains around the square. We also happened across a gentleman that had a bird of prey he was showing off flying above us, hopefully scaring some of those pigeons away.

Working our way down towards Westminster, crossing the river and then taking a bus from the South Bank also gave some picturesque opportunities to try to capture. Arriving at Covent Garden we had a warming snack of a Ben's Cookie and Hot Chocolate drink whilst walking around the market stalls and shops.

We then set off to Leicester Square and after not finding any tickets for Cirque below 70 pounds per person, decided to pop into the Prince Charles Cinema where they were just about to show Melonchia. This is not a Hollywood film, so can be considered a bit weird, but sitting back in those leather chairs, we enjoyed it all the same.

With hunger starting to set in we headed off to Chinatown where we sat down and had dumplings, duck with pancakes and lemon and chili chicken. A quick walk to help digest, and then we caught the train (this time with the heating working) back to Oxford.

Later in the week we went to the Oxford Playhouse to see "Flamenco - Rafael and Friends". This was a great mix of Rafael on the guitar, with different types of drums / bongos, and lots of tap dancing (sitting down as well as standing up). The speed of those feet, and the mixes of voice, music and tapping really made for a great night.

What a great set of experiences to have enjoyed...

(more photos can be found here)

Oxford Shooting

2012-01-20T08:08:00.000Z

Don't worry, it hasn't suddenly become some violent crime hotspot (well, not to my knowledge anyway). Last Saturday, after finally receiving the last part of my self-given Christmas present, and with lovely sunny weather, I went into town in order to test shoot some photos.

So, walking around the grounds of Christchurch, along the high street, and around the Radcliffe Camera, we had a few opportunities to frame some of the typical architecture and tourist sights of Oxford.

Christchurch of course being famous for being used in the Harry Potter films most recently. Unfortunately nobody from the films was here to pose for the shot, so I got a local to pose instead (see photo above).

Not all of Oxford is old stone-coloured buildings, as you can see below, there are also nice examples of pastel colours being used for external walls in amongst the other church-like structures:

And just to stop you thinking everything is square here, we also have fine example of cylindrical buildings, which are the perfect shape for storing all the books that are published in the UK (admittedly, most of them are in the underground cellars...):

There are also some unsavoury sights and stories around town. To find out all the details you will have to come visit, but I leave you with one example of what you can expect to find:

So what are you waiting for? Come and book your place to visit now :)

If you are still undecided, take a look at the rest of the photos here, and see if they can persuade you...

Revisiting 2011 Goals

2012-01-10T08:25:00.000Z

As mentioned in my previous post, there was a bit of a goal to achieve by the end of the year. The Oxford Ale Trail from Brakspear involved 19 pubs dotted around Oxford, whereby one had to drink a pint in each one to receive a stamp in the booklet. Once 10 stamps were collected you are given a t-shirt, and once all have been visited you get a tour around the brewery in Witney.

When you start on this quest (booklets are given out in October) you have all the time in the world. Three months to get 19 pubs done, easy !
Of course, as you get further on in time, you realise you don't actually have many free nights when you can go to some of the out-of-the-way pubs.

As December looms, you start to panic, with still 10 pubs left and needing to do your Christmas shopping, you can't seem to find the time to collect any more stamps. This is when the logic thinking comes into play, and you ascertain that you will have to do a good few pubs in one night.

So on December 30th we set off to visit the Cape of Good Hope, Hobgoblin, Chester Arms and finished at the Royal Oak. Despite the weather trying to put us off, the fact that the Chester Arms was well hidden, and that we'd heard many a story about the Hobgoblin, we actually made it to all of them, having the last pint at the Royal Oak just before closing time.

What a great end to the year, and I'm sure we'll revisit many of these pubs again as we did not have chance to taste all the different ales, nor the food that we often saw being served whilst drinking our pints.

So 2012 allows us to prepare ourselves for completing this trail with more time to spare hopefully.

Cheers !

Old Year's Goals and New Year's Party

2012-01-01T13:40:00.002Z

The last three months has seen some very dedicated concentration in order to achieve a certain goal before the end of 2011. Finally on Dec 30th we succeeded. Yes, 19 pubs later, The Oxford Ale Trail was completed, and with one day to spare, no less.

The work towards this goal saw us visiting many a drinking house within the confines of the city which we would not normally have seen, let alone entered. With the t-shirt collected, just have to organise the tour of the brewery in Witney some time soon. What a good feeling having achieved that goal of goals in time for the new year to start with new ones.

Following on from the party we had in Oxford last year with Ali, Luigi and Roberto, New Year 2012 was seen in with Doug and Gem. A 20s theme was on the cards (although we didn't know about this beforehand) which meant the bar staff were dressed very fancy. Great food was consumed (the 9oz steaks and Bailey's Creme Brulee were of note) and afterwards the disco in the marquee picked up the spirits too. A very good time had by all, and a great reunion.

So now it's 2012. A new year with new resolutions. I wonder what yours are? In any case, here's wishing you all the fun, enjoyment and success for the coming twelve months, and hoping all your dreams come true.

More pictures can be found here.

To a healthy and prosperous year !

German Christmas Market Meetup

2011-12-30T18:11:00.000Z

The Christmas days were spent this year as well celebrating in the surrounds of Wiesbaden in Germany.Unlike previous years, there was no snow on the ground, no freezing temperatures and no chaos at the airports. However, Lufthansa still managed to make us wait an extra hour in the plane before take off because "...there are a lot of people on board". Yes, without the annual excuse of poor weather conditions to blame, they resorted to telling us that they were not prepared for a plane to be nearly full during the festive season.

In Mainz we were able to meet up with Mar, Ali, Roberto and Mamen. A visit to the Christmas market also was not forgotten, but the poorly laid out stalls (like every year) meant that one was forced to squeeze between people to get to where the drinks were being served, and then try and squeeze out again without spilling your drink over anyone nearby. This is where the Hyde Park and Oxford xmas markets do have their advantages.

It was then off to the villages of Wiesbaden to see Friedi, Marc, Julianne, Christiane and the rest of the family. Much was eaten, drunk, and many a sudoku filled in during this time. The usual walk in the snow was of course slightly altered to being a quick walk in the surrounds of the house, as it's not as much fun without the crisp crunchy stuff to tread on.

Back to Mainz to see Vera and Kiani (what a lovely drawing I was given) and then afterwards we met up with Britta, Johannes and Maya. Great to catch up with all the news since we last saw them, and to see that they are still doing well.

Finally time to fly back, and this time the flight actually left on time (although did arrive 20 mins late).

Since then, have met up with the parental people for a late xmas meal (next time we'll reduce the number of carafes of wine I think...) and hopefully get to meet up with more come New Years Eve.

Good luck in the sales !!

Winter Wonderland @ Hyde Park

2011-12-25T13:40:00.000Z

What with Oxford's Christmas Market not quite standing up against the ones of Germany, the week afterwards we decided to go and have a visit to what London has to offer.

The plan was to take a leisurely stroll through the markets of Hyde Park, South Bank and opposite the Tower of London. A visit to Oxford Street to see the lights was also on the todo list, as was a possible visit to some of the big department stores.

Arriving at Hyde Park Corner, we noticed straight away that something was happening. The tube was a lot more full than usual, and as we came out to ground level, we saw the mass of people before us. However, looks could be deceiving, as at a slightly slower walking pace you could actually get to where you wanted without having to push past many people (a far cry from the (Mainz Christmas Market).

In Hyde Park, they have erected many stalls selling Christmas gifts, handicrafts, food and drink. There was a German village area with German beer, sausages, music and Gluehwein; there was a helter-skelter, lots of other amusements, as well as an ice rink.

Walking around this wonderland really did impress us. Not only did it take two and a half hours to return to the beginning again (this place is huge!), but the selection of food was great (Christmas Dinner in a bap anyone?), the glow juice was also very tasty, and you didn't feel cramped, sticky or dirty (adjectives that I would often use when in the Mainz Christmas Market).

After enjoying all Hyde Park had to offer (ok, we didn't try something from every stall...) and looking at what time it was, we decided to give the other markets a miss, and instead head off to Harrods.

Looking around this huge store, with all the festive lighting and decorations was definitely a good choice. Amongst the noteworthy things seen was a throne for a dog, a Christmas pudding cat bag, and a leg of ham costing 1500 pounds (they didn't give us a tester of this though)...

Next up was Oxford Street, where, to our surprise, all traffic was blocked, and the streets were taken over by pedestrians. This really made a difference to getting down this road that would normally be packed and difficult to maneuver. Whilst consuming a belgian waffle, we were delighted to see that a firework was just beginning, which we watched from the middle of the road.

Once the light display was over, we moved down to the Liberty store, which was also nicely done up for the Christmas period. From here it was time to head back to Paddington to get the train back to Oxford.

A very nice Christmas trip to London to finish off 2011.

More pictures can be seen here.

Oxford Festive Market

2011-12-21T08:02:00.000Z

Also a bit delayed, but at the Oxford Castle there is currently the Oxford Christmas Market. Not that big, but still has a stand with the German sausages, another with mulled wine, one with Fruit Punch (Feuerzangebowle) and a selection of handicraft stalls.

So, as the first market we had visited this winter, it was pretty good, and gave a god taster for what was to come.

To see more photos, click here.

Mainz Meetup and No Christmas Markets

2011-12-04T22:19:00.000Z

A couple of weeks ago we were back in Mainz and managed to meet up with many people still there (although just missed Luigi, who arrived a week later). It was much colder than in the UK, which meant I had a whole week to catch a cold as I had forgotten how the weather there can feel a lot worse than the thermometer says.

So Carlitos, Roberto, Ali, Mamen, Patricia and Valentin were there and with Olgui and myself we managed to fill up the long table again. Food was the usual staple of Flammkuchen, Quiches, Salads and a big piece of meat (yes, that was Carlitos).

A good evening was had by all, and it was great to meet up again, despite it being just one meal.

The Sunday was spent at Friedi, Marc and Juliane's place, with Christiane playing the aunty. It was very good to see the whole family again, and see Juliane grow up so quickly (next time she'll be able to clean more than the sofa table).

And as predicted, by the time of the flight home, the cold had fully hit and so I arrived back in the UK with my ears blocked. Not the best way to experience the change in pressure of an aircraft.

Next time will hopefully give the opportunity to see everyone for a bit longer and we'll be better prepared for the cold weather...

(more photos can be found here)

Sunday Sun and the Hills of Brill

2011-11-28T21:59:00.000Z

Sunday started with bright sunshine shining through the windows, which for the end of November is pretty good going. So with haste a route was planned online to take most advantage of the rest of the day (having woken up late, it was already 10:30am).

The plan was to head off from Kidlington to Aylesbury going the scenic route. This seemed fine looking at the road map, maybe slightly pushing for time to get back before it gets dark, but I would check how far I got by 1pm and make my way back.

First village to pass through was Islip, and on it went to Oddington which was quite picturesque. Then on to Charlton-on-Otmoor which is when I started to realise the error in planning a route from a road map.

Yes, there were no contour lines for the terrain. As such, I missed seeing the multiple hills both up and down along the rest of the journey. Already an hour into the journey, I needed to catch up in order to manage Aylesbury and meet up with my parents there.

On I went through Fencott, Murcott, and then came Boarstall. This was the first major hill that forced me to take a breather. Maybe I was out of shape, maybe my tires were losing air, but it was a very short sharp uphill which allowed me to take a long swig from the water bottle. That will make the bike lighter, I thought..

By then I could have taken a closer look at the terrain coming up afterwards, as next stop was the village of Brill in Buckinghamshire. The previously encountered hills were nothing in comparison to these ones. Starting with a very slow upward hill that went on for a while, just when you're getting tired of it, up pops the steep bit (10%). If that wasn't enough to make you give up, once you get over the brow, the steep bit drops off and it becomes a less steep upward slope.

After a few stops on the way up, I finally made it up to the top to see how this place makes use of the location - by having a windmill on the top of the hill. The view was very pretty, but I couldn't stop for long, as I had to head on with my route. Following the road I realised I now had to go down the same steepness of hill on the other side. Well, at least it was good practice for my brakes...

Down at the bottom of the hill, and checking the signposts, there didn't seem to be the next place on my list (Chilton). Consulting the GPS (smartphones have their uses) I realised that there were in fact two possible ways out of Brill, and I had just taken the wrong one. Not wanting to ascend the hill I had just descended, I decided to head on going through Wotton Underwood and Dorton before getting back on track in Chilton.

At this point, I realised I might make it to the final destination, but I wouldn't make it back home again whilst it was light. After a quick telephone check, it was decided to meet up in Thame for a quick energy boost (I had just eaten a hot cross bun for breakfast) before deciding the best way (ie flattest) back to Kidlington.

Of course, once in the scenic route, it's difficult to come out of it, so I still had to pass through Chearsley and Cuddington before hitting the main road which I then took to Thame. I had fallen short by just 6 miles of Aylesbury, and more importantly I had not made it to the village of Gibraltar.

In Thame, after spending over 20 mins waiting for service at a near empty pub/restaurant/bar, we went across the road where there was the offer of steaks or burgers. The burger with bacon and egg was just the ticket for recouping the lost energy so far.

By now, there was no chance of cycling all the way back without having to do unlit roads in the dark. So a quick cycle to Haddenham and Thame Parkway rail station, meant I was able to catch the train to Bicester, where I just had to make it along the very busy A-road back to Kidlington.

After a very bumpy cycle path for part of the way, and a very busy main road for where the cycle paths were missing, I just made it back before it was completely dark.

So all in all a great trip, cut short by starting too late and then getting lost coming out of Brill. Next time a different route will be found taking into account the terrain...

Remember, remember...

2011-11-06T19:08:00.001Z

No, it didn't start with V for vendetta...

Yes, the fifth of November was upon us, and there was no excuse - the weather was as clear as could be. So off we went to South Park (no, not that one ,the one in Oxford...) to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night.

Here amongst the thousands of people that turned out, we saw a great firework display over the spires of Oxford.

After the wows and the ahhhs that were let out by each new burst of light and sound in the sky, it was time to watch the setting on fire of the guy. This one was a massive person-shaped structure made out of crates and made a sinister spectre once it was fully burning, with its limbs sticking out like something from a horror film...

Meeting up with Diego and Hannah for a great drink, meal, and after meal drinks, it made a great end to a great day.

(see more photos here)

Next year we will get some sparklers too :)

Time for a Bath

2011-10-31T08:16:00.000Z

With Christmas, anniversaries and birthdays coming upon us thick and fast, we decided it would be great to get out of Oxford for the weekend. Using the National Express special offer tickets we got a great deal to Bath.

Accommodation was sorted out here at a stone's throw from the city centre, allowing us to visit the shops, bring back the bags and go back into town for dinner without wasting any time.

Of course, there were all the major sales on in the shops, and some great places for eating (Peking Chinese's crispy aromatic duck was amazing, as was Jimmy Spice's assortment of Italian, Chinese, Thai, and Indian food). Breakfast pancakes (scotch) and bacon muffins (English) taste great at The Bridge Coffee Shop. And the best tip ever, is to go to ShakeAway (near to M&S, Burton) where they have a huge selection of milkshakes (see menu here). The "Janet" was really good, and tasted of Frozo Malt (for those of you from Barranquilla).

The historic bits of the city are also worth seeing, the cathedral, abbey, bridges and architecture are all famous here (more photos can be found following this link).

So all in all a very good whistle-stop trip to a lovely city !

Of Mermaids and Old Men

2011-10-24T21:47:00.000Z

On the 23rd October 2011 a 60th birthday was celebrated in a hotel which once belonged to the family. On this occasion, it was being taken over by people from all over the world, and most corners of the UK.

Wend had organised the whole weekend, and everything was going to plan. Cue surprise entrances from family and extended family, lovely food at the Bury Head Hotel, and a pound of tuppences to play on the pier.

Fun was had by all, and I think nobody will be forgetting this weekend any time soon. The mermaid on the cake, the 'edited' picture on the wall, and the copious amounts of wine drunk in the early hours by some, were all memories going to stick for sure.

So here's wishing Clive all the best for the next 60...

(click here to see the rest of the photos)

October Weather Shock

2011-10-02T14:06:00.000Z

In case you were wondering, September is completely missing from this blog. This can only mean one thing - holiday! And after holiday come the postings with photos, which will be following and backdated soon.

In the meantime, it is now October 2nd and it's bright sunshine outside, 27 degrees, and blue sky.
And here's me at home doing the tax forms...

But at least we got out yesterday for a great picnic at Blenheim Palace (photos here) with Diego 2.

Bathing in the sun, picnicking in the shade, and a smoothie in the village - fun was had all round.

Now back to those numbers...

Cincinnati - The City, The Weather, The Wedding

2011-09-09T06:12:00.002Z

Beginning September in Cincinnati was the plan. Celebrating a wedding was the plan. Shopping downtown was the plan. The plan wasn't quite stuck to.

Taking the Greyhound coach down from Detroit to Cincinnati was an experience. Final destination was Birmingham (Alabama), which meant the other passengers looked and talked like they just came out of a southern film set. The seats were fine though, and I settled down for the 5 to 6 hours journey.

After leaving Toledo (pronounced Tolido) we suddenly pulled in to a rest stop unannounced. The driver got out, walked round to the back of the bus and looked at the wheels. She then came back on the bus and told us that the back axle had broken, and this bus wasn't going any further. There was a second bus slightly behind us that might have some seats free, and then a new bus would come down in 3 hours. This wasn't quite the news the passengers were looking forward to, especially those going to the last stop.

After half an hour, the driver came back over the tannoy and told everyone to strap up. The bus just behind us is now actually in front of us (it didn't stop), and the bus sent out to rescue us wouldn't get here until 5 or 6 hours time.So we were told to buckle up, and people in the back were told to keep an eye out for flames or smoke. Suffice it to say that nobody slept on the rest of the journey, traveling at great speed to catch up on lost time (instead of going slow to reduce risks...), with the back of the bus wobbling around the corners.

Only an hour late, we arrived at Cincinnati at 10pm with a temperature of 34 degrees Celsius!

The next day was tourism day. We set off to visit the sights, having lunch at Skyline Chili, and walking around downtown. Taking the Duck Tour going through 3 counties and 2 states was a great way of catching up on the history of the city as well as seeing the sights from the river.

The shopping part of the day wasn't quite as expected. It was actually very difficult to find any big stores in downtown, and across in Newport wasn't much better. Never mind, with the temperatures not going below 35 degrees, a few stops in the shops that were available allowed us to cool down, even if we didn't buy anything.

Of course, it wasn't for the shopping that we were in this city. No, we were here for the wedding of Chelsea and Eric. Meeting up with Patty, Stan, Jennifer, Gary and Kelly, we went off to the wedding across the road from the hotel (luckily we didn't have to go far in that heat).

The ceremony was great, the dress amazing, and the meal, speeches, and party were enjoyed by all. So congratulations to the married couple !

You can see all the photos of this trip here...

Typical Tigers, Lake Waves and Happy Days

2011-09-04T07:23:00.000Z

Whilst staying in Ann Arbor (MI) at the end of August, I was relieved that the weather held out for me to be able to see some of the scenery.

First up was to go to Lake Michigan, where there were actually bigger waves than I've seen in many European sea beaches ! Of course, you don't expect this with a lake, but as it's so big, the moon seems to cause tides in it too.

Whilst jumping waves and climbing the hugs sand banks with a light breeze, one can forget that the sun was shining and it was just gone midday. So yes, you guessed it, a sunburn was the outcome. At least it didn't spoil the day itself :)

On the way to the lake we stopped off for lunch (Matt, Ben and myself) at the 70s Diner. This is straight out of the series Happy Days, where the great tasting burgers and amazing shakes are delivered on a tray that attaches to your car window. This was an unforgettable experience, and well worth repeating.

Later in the week there was the opportunity to see the Detroit Tigers play the Kansas City Royals (baseball). This trip was undertaken by Gary, Patty, Stan, Dandan, Sean, Ben and Boris.

Of course, a game isn't a game without doing some more of the typical things in the stadium. Cue a corn dog, cheesy tortilla chips, and a tub of local lager. The stadium was a hive of activity, and fun was had by all. The fact that nobody had won after full time, meant that extra time was called for. And in true Guiri style, yours truly went off to the bathroom whilst the Tigers were batting (as it wasn't so busy then), and duly missed the winning home walk...c'est la vie!

So this trip allowed me to tick those boxes that I didn't get chance to on the other trips over here, and therefore will be remembered for a long time.

Little Known Ben and Alician Museums

2011-08-20T23:21:00.000Z

Slowly catching up now, bear with me.

Back at the end of July, we had another visit from that lady of alician nature. Yes, she doesn't seem to get enough of us, and so had come back in order to get a bit of pampering.

So, a bit of shopping was in order, followed by a production of Anthony and Cleopatra in an open air amphitheatre on top of the business school building. Definitely something different.

Of course a trip to London was also in order. This time the weather held up, so we first went and saw a not-so-well-known city icon. Yes, you might know of Big Ben, but the odds are that you have never seen Little Ben. This little gem is situated right outside of Victoria Station and is another great example of what you can find if you go off the tourist track.

Then it was time to hit the museums. Well one in fact, but it's big enough to be counted multiple times. That's right, the British Museum was on the list for today. A quick visit to some of the newer exhibitions (like the Australian one) was followed by the Egyptian mega-exhibition. Working our way between the statues, and the crowds of people it was a relief to stop off in the great court to have lunch (taking in the amazing glass ceiling).

Before we had to leave this city, we still had time to relax in Green Park (although all the deck chairs were already taken), and enjoyed the sun whilst people watching.

So a great time was had by all, and hopefully a bit of culture taken in. Thanks Ali for a wonderful time !

French Visits and Footing London

2011-08-14T13:59:00.001Z

Again a bit delayed, but back in mid July we had a visit from Celi, coming over from Paris on the Eurostar (makes a change to all those that take the plane). Personally I think she was trying to escape Bastille Day, although with the amount of tourists in Oxford and London at this time, I wouldn't count it as much of an escape...

Apart from coming over for the organised Harry Potter Tour of Oxford (coinciding with the release of the final film), she also wanted to take on the services of yours truly as tour guide for London.

Ever up for a challenge, I prepared a tour to cover all sorts of interesting sights tailored to her preferences. Usually I make sure quite a bit of walking is involved in my tours, allowing participants to actually see quite a lot of London that they would normally have missed. It also means they get tired a couple of hours before time to come back to Oxford, allowing me to 'reluctantly' suggest stopping off at a nearby pub.

We started off at Paddington, taking the bus across to Camden Market, walking around the stalls and stables for a while, and sitting down on a scooter to eat our lunch. Then took the tube down to Green Park, where we walked down through the park to Buckingham Palace. From here we walked along the lake until we came down to Westminster. Passing Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament we went over Westminster Bridge (taking photos looking back across the River Thames at parliament).

From here we walked along the river (to the left of the bridge when you arrive on the south side) until we got to the Tate Modern. We used their facilities (very clean, by the way) and viewed some of the unusual art and photos on show, as well as the building itself (old power station).

After the cultural part, we walked further eastwards until we got to Shakespeare's Globe Theatre, where unfortunately there were no tickets left for todays shows, nor were they doing tours, as a show was currently in progress (tip: get there in the morning to get on a tour).

Walking back the way we had come, we took the millennium bridge linking the Tate Modern to the original Tate Gallery (upon being built, it swayed so much that people got sick, and so it had to be rebuilt to reinforce the stability of it).

Arriving at the other bank of the Thames you have in front of you St Paul's Cathedral. Upon entering we caught part of a sermon which actually mentioned Harry Potter in it (a bonus for Celi!). We then made our way towards Holborn, walking along the roads and observing the buildings around us.

At this point, Celi had not complained at all about having walked too far, or being tired, so for the first time ever, I had to propose having a rest at a local pub outside of Paddington station! Is this a sign that I'm getting weak? Or maybe that she does enough walking around the streets of Paris, to rival my tours? I'll let you decide that one.

Of course, the other days she was here, we also went around Oxford, visiting some colleges, St Mary's Tower, and some of the local pubs.

Hopefully she'll remember the visit favourably (as we did) and come again soon...

(See all the photos here)

Knee Breaking Hills and Bavarian Weddings

2011-08-06T15:15:00.004Z

A bit late in reporting, but just over a month ago (25th June), Martin and Sibylle got married in a lovely Bavarian village close to Wuerzburg called Castell (from the Faber-Castell pens fame). The weather may not have been playing ball during the weekend, but it stayed dry for the most part and a lovely day was had by all.

We also met up with the rest of Martin's family after a very long time, and were able to chat for a while with Ulrike.

The time around the wedding was spent visiting Wuerzburg with the newly married couple, going up to the palace in the bright sunshine and looking out over the city. We also managed a rushed lunch out on the ramparts (well, Kaesespaetzle for some of us, and cake for the rest).

And where does the knee-breaking hill come into this? Well, in order to get to the church one had to go up a pretty steep hill, which was appropriately named (the pub at the base of it also had the same name)...

So an enjoyable time was had by all, a lot of catch-up from the last decade or so, and a great occasion to do it at. So here's to a long and fruitful life together Martin & Sibylle !

Weddings, Reunions and lots of Food

2011-07-26T12:20:00.001Z

So just came back from our trip to Italy, taking in the Adriatic coast in Bellaria, and the city delights in Bologna, meeting up with Luca, Laura, Giulia, Noelia, Ramsy, and Jorge, all from Erasmus years in Mainz.

The weather was of course very hot (more breeze at the coast of course) but Bologna's great arches provided enough shade to walk in. The food was, as always, impeccable. Great amounts of fish, shellfish and pasta were enjoyed, and of course, the local wine was savoured too.

The main reason for this trip, however, was the wedding of Giulia to Simone. This took place in a town high above Bologna with great views across the valley.

The church ceremony was the usual Italian affair (I'm told) with people standing up on pews and chairs to be able to catch a glimpse of the bride on her arrival. Inside it was actually very hot, but this was taken care of with the white fans that were provided to guests.

Then off to the villa where the celebrations were to take place, stopping by at Vale's to pick up our luggage. In the grounds of the villa there were tables set up as well as some marquees in case of bad weather. In fact there was a thunderstorm during the night, seemingly getting closer and closer, but all that was felt by us were 4 drops of rain.

You can imagine what the food was like. Well, maybe you can't, but it was amazing. Having a huge central Italian cheese to nibble off was definitely one of the highlights. The wedding cake took the form of an ice-cream cake (apparently very common in the summer in Italy). and afterwards the men were invited to change into their swimming trunks and wear braces (Giulia's idea - don't ask) and to brave the waters of the outside swimming pool. Considering it was by now 1am, you could imagine how cold the water was when you saw Giulia herself attempt to enter it, realised it was too cold, and jumped out again immediately.

Of course there was a lot of dancing going along too, and everybody had a roaring time. Even the baby in a pram outside managed to sleep through everything (something in the milk?).

So congratulations to Giulia and Simone, and may you have a healthy and enjoyable future together!

Mexican suitcases, decriminalising pianos, and wimbledon grunts

2011-07-20T23:51:00.000Z

Slightly late round up this week, seeing as there were weddings, visits and generally a lot to do.

A Mexican has hit the record books as one of the most inventive escape attempts made from jail. He hid inside a suitcase that his girlfriend had brought in, and claimed to contain dirty laundry. The fact that she had trouble taking it out as it was so heavy, tipped the guards off, apparently.

With the 2012 Olympics hitting the news every other day, here's something that might need to get sorted out before the actual start of the event. On the online olympics store, they were selling a keyring with the union flag on it - done incorrectly. It begs belief that these sort of things can get so far before anyone notices...

Another piece of red tape created by the previous government, this time one not so much talked about. Apparently it has been illegal for bars, pubs, hotels to play pianos without paying a licence fee. Now a bill is going through the process to get this act revoked, and allow people to play musical instruments in public places without requiring an entertainment licence.

Now that Wimbledon is over, some of you are probably relaxing in the pure sound of outside birds with no more grunting sounds coming from the women players on court. Well, so that you can prepare for next year, there is now an application that allows you to turn down various aspects of the sound - including the grunting. Yes, you can remove it completely, or turn it up even, if you're into that sort of thing...

And finally, taking religious rules to the extreme, an Austrian man has claimed that having a pasta sieve on his head is his religious headgear, and so has had his driving licence photo taken with it on. And it was accepted. This must join the ranks of Health & Safety, and Political Correctness, and hopefully should get sorted out with some common sense soon.

Keep your hat on...

News snippets you could live without

2011-06-29T21:54:00.000Z

German companies are moving over to advanced security in the workplace now. When in meetings that are of a secretive nature, they put a biscuit tin in the middle of the table and participants place their mobiles into it. Of course there is some scientific backing to this, but in order to make sure you don't trust something that isn't secure, The Register has done a test and found out for you which biscuit tins will work. Read it here now...

In Australia, a man has come up with a great business idea that is bound to make a profit. The government is giving out tax credits for people that reduce the output of greenhouse gases. As there are many camels around the area, he reckon that by eliminating them would cause a huge reduction in gases due to the reduced methane from lack of camel wind. Novel is definitely a word for it...

3D printing is slowly becoming a reality, and what better way to first use it, than to start 'printing' of your first bikini set. Yes, the scientists have concentrated on the things close to their hearts and produced 3D printable bras too. Rumours that pressing a button on your mobile will automatically undo them, are as yet unfounded...

In the US, a man is trying to get out of a series of charges made against him including drunk driving, and speeding, as he is claiming he was at the time having intimate relations (my words, not his) in the back seat at the time. Just how one can drive at that speed whilst under the influence and being busy in the back of a car has yet to be understood, but I'm sure it'd make the Guinness Book of Records...

And if you were appalled about the guy that sold his internal organs in order to get an iPad2, then you might find the latest financing attempt of a like mind. A young lady from China decided to auction off her first time to someone that would get her the latest iPhone. Apparently after finally getting the deed done she went to the store to find out there were no white ones left in stock...

So sit back and dream of the time when such stupidities did not exist, and people would sell off their sticks to have the latest fire-maker...

Jericho Street Fair and Communication Problems

2011-06-20T18:13:00.000Z

On 11th June in Jericho, Oxford, the annual Jericho Street Fair took place.
Well, apparently this is the case. Getting there at 7pm there were just two tents up. One housing the band, and one the beer. I suppose it was a very efficient setup. Food stalls were also sparse, with a few lonely sausages on show at the Big Bang stand, and the scraps of leftovers of Asian food.

The music kept the crowd happy, and the beer was refreshing, but something was lacking.
That's when I heard the voice of Alessio (ok, he was calling my name) who had also turned up. We then headed off to the Gardener's Arms, where a hearty meal and a drink were consumed. So all in all it was worth the exploratory trip.

Waiting at the gate to depart from Heathrow knowing that the flight was already running late, I was looking out over a lovely sunny blue sky to be told over tannoy "We currently have another hour of delay. This is due to weather". It wasn't just me who looked out of the window with a frown on our faces. In a later announcement it was added "due to the weather in Frankfurt", which I duly checked on my phone to see that it was dry there too. After a good hour and a half we finally boarded and were underway, to be told by the captain that the delay was actually due to some work on the airport tower they had just finished, and apparently the staff weren't trained yet how to use it. Apart from the training part, the thing that really got me, was the fact that the communication was so bad that they each told us different stories.

Well, the bad weather did start this morning in Mainz, so maybe they were just 12 hours early with their forecast the night before...

Off tonight to casa del lobelto for a surprise dinner of je ne sais quoit. Let's hope the heavens don't break...

Wantage Wedding and Ali's German Vegetable Escape

2011-06-12T21:15:00.001Z

Before the month of May was out, I had to venture back to Mainz. Despite the long hours in the office, a few hours were enjoyed each night with various friends: Carlitos, Ali, Diani and Jan.

The main event of this month has to be the italo-anglican wedding between Hannah and Diego on June 2nd. The celebrations were accompanied by the afropean choir, as well as some musical talent shown by the bride and groom themselves. Now off on their honeymoon, they are missing the miserable weather we are currently experiencing, which is very nicely planned on their part.

Germany has caused a bit of a furore by blaming an outbreak of E.coli on Spanish cucumbers. Straight away they banned Spanish vegetables, but apparently without any actual proof. After causing huge amount of suffering to the farmers in Spain it was announced that in fact they could have been mistaken, that it might actually have come from a bean sprout farm just south of Hamburg. So nothing like pointing the finger first and then actually trying to find the truth...

In fact, they still don't know for sure the real biological cause, but are merely following the pattern of the outbreak. I wonder whether the EU, EC or whatever body feels responsible here are actually going to act on this blatant shift of blame, to another country's detriment?
What if it was found that German cars caused large radiation doses in all passengers? With the same amount of investigation (all people with high radiation doses had ridden once in a German made automobile) maybe then they will feel the other end of lousy research and despicable marketing.

So, in order to escape the ban on vegetables, Ali came over to visit us again in Oxford. Unfortunately the weather didn't hold up for the trip to London and was a little wet, but visiting the food festival in Reading was nice and bright. Hopefully she left with some good memories too. Next time we can see more dinosaurs...

Enjoy your meat...

Flying History

2011-05-23T20:00:00.005Z

Don't worry, I am not planning on giving you a long-winded story on the history of flying from the Wright brothers to the Space shuttle, although I might keep that for later on :)

A couple of weekends ago the Abingdon Air and Country Show took place. There must have been a good few thousand visitors there, with many stands selling home made marmalade, chutney, cider, as well as games to play. Of course, the main attraction was in the air. Paratroopers, biplanes, trainers and gliders were all present, but the thing everybody wanted to see was of course the Vulcan. This is the last flying one around, yet is still able to impress. It's silence and near invisibility whilst coming towards you turns into a rip-roaring ringing of your ears as it speeds away overhead. Definitely something to be experienced !

The weekend after it was time for Hannah and Diego to celebrate before they tie the knot. So appropriately there was a Han-do for the girls and a stag-do for the boys (+Nina). Great fun was had by all involved, with few people waking up early the next morning...

This weekend saw a surprise visit from Will who was up in Oxford on Saturday. A brief visit to the Turf Tavern was duly rewarded with thirst-quenching beverages. Last time this place was visited was at new year with Luigi, Roberto and Ali. Unfortunately it was closed then. I can confirm that it is as good as it looked though :)

Well, the weather isn't quite sure what it's doing, with very gusty winds shooting the clouds across the skies. When the sun becomes unhidden though the temperature goes up dramatically. Let's hope the icelandic volcano eruption doesn't combine with these winds though - could become unpredictable.

So, keep your hat on...

Wallingford Walks, Oxford Colleges, Cambridge Duke & Duchess

2011-05-07T22:01:00.006Z

With Maria over here visiting us, a few touristy things were in order. In Oxford, a few colleges were actually open and so we took the chance to go around them. Merton provided us with some interesting quads, whereas Lincoln will be remembered for being completely green (and that's not just the lawns).

A day trip to Wallingford was also organised (Agatha Christie area). Although we didn't see any murder mysteries going on, we did have a lovely walk around the old castle gardens and meadows (you probably saw the photos on the right hand side of the page) before getting the bus back to Oxford.

The Royal Wedding on April 29th 2011 was not seen in London by us. Not too keen on the 4am start people were having to make to be able to share a push and shove with other people trying to get a photo. We did set up the TV to record the whole day (just in case), but decided to head off to Blenheim Palace for their big screen showing on their south lawn, picnicking with the other families, cheering and waving flags. They also had a jousting competition and some falconry, which was great after the main event had finished with "I do".

All in all, a very busy weekend, and the weather held out marvelously for it...

Royal Wedding and Birthday Celebrations

2011-04-28T07:24:00.000Z

There might be a little fuss going on around here at the moment. Something to do with a royal wedding maybe? Basically you can't switch on the TV, radio, open a paper or go into a shop without coming into contact with this royal event. So where are you going to be for it? At a street party? In London outside the palace? Glued to the front of the TV with the other 2 billion people? Why not let me know through the new poll on this subject...

Today is he day before the wedding, but is just as important (if not more so). It's Olga's birthday ! Yes, not mentioning her age, but she celebrates a new year today and we hope to celebrate it accordingly later on when she gets back from work. Happy Birthday !! :)

So, a bit of a short post today as also need to prepare for Maria's visit, and still need to clean the place...

Statistics is not all boring maths

2011-04-24T12:02:00.002Z

...it can be physics too :)

So, I thought you might like to hear a bit about who's been visiting this site, and what they're doing on it.

First off comments. These are the things you can leave at the bottom of the posts to express your opinion. It seems there have only been 3 comments so far, done by two different people. So now you know how they work, why not go ahead and say something (nothing obnoxious though please).

Next to the button for posting comments, there are icons for emailing the post to someone, tweeting it to your followers, or posting it on your wall in facebook. So why not give it a go and help spread the word, you can look all Web2.0ey as well and impress your peers.

The polls don't seem to be going down too well, only a couple of participants over the last 4 polls makes me wonder if it's worthwhile continuing with them. So how about writing a comment below to tell me if you want them kept?

Since moving over to the new site (back in August 2010) we have been having more visitors nearly every month. In fact, April has the highest hits yet!

Regarding the most popular posts, currently one from 2009 has the most hits (I'm not going to say which one, as I prefer you to visit the new ones). All the later ones have actually a quite low amount of visits, although this might be because until now, the links that I posted were to the site in general and not to specific post.

Referral sites have google doing it's bit at the top, followed by facebook, then nbgecko, stupidforce, anathemaesto, nuestrobarcodecolegas and lajirafitarayada. Thanks for your support!

The majority of you seem to be using Firefox now with IE reducing each month. Mobile browsers are also being used more frequently. Windows is installed on just over 60% of visitor's computers, although linux variants are gaining.

This month the UK is top of the country list, with Germany, USA, Russia, Belgium (thanks Jordi), Netherlands (must be Bas), Spain, Colombia, Latvia, Georgia, Ukraine, Singapore, Cambodia and Iran (?).

So from all these statistics I can tell that me readership is so out of the ordinary, that there's no typical reader !

Circolombia, Persian Paddington, Midnight Tango

2011-04-20T20:55:00.000Z

With no visitors around last weekend, we went out to The Roundhouse in Camden to see an amazing production from Circolombia called Urban. The stunts were stunning, and the show is really worth visiting if you get a chance, the performers taking part being disadvantaged young people from Colombia.

Whilst in London we wanted an early dinner before catching the train back to Oxford. It was news to me that around Paddington there are a lot of Persian restaurants and shops, but not one to shy from new experiences, we entered an Iraqi, Persian and Kurdish restaurant called Valentino. We can definitely recommend many of these dishes. We tried the mixed starters, which really were tasty, and for mains tried the meat platter, lamb shanks, spinach stew and mixed pulses stew. We were definitely well fed at this chance visit, and will return.

After taking Tango lessons back in Mainz last year, we were missing it a bit. So when we heard that a show was coming to Oxford based on this dance and with a storyline, we thought we better give it a try. so off we went to see Midnight Tango. We were probably the only ones not knowing who Flavia was (UK TV didn't really make it over to Germany) but that didn't matter. Most of the tunes we had heard and danced to were played here, and the variety of dancing on the stage really was spectacular. What a way to get back into the spirit, now let's google tango courses in oxford...

What a cultural time !

London Tour #1

2011-04-14T12:29:00.001Z

Is far from the first tour I've done around London, but it is the first one I've decided to write down for other people to try out, so here goes:

Time Needed:: 1/2 Day
Best Time to Start: 11am
Weather Required: Dry, sunshine best
Starting Point: Covent Garden Tube Station
Tickets Required: Zones 1 & 2

When arriving at Covent Garden Tube Station by tube, make your way up the 193 steps to street level (be aware this is not for the faint hearted).
Exit to the right and head down to Covent Garden Covered Market.
Here you can enjoy the architecture of the market (both inside and out), watch solo artists perform inside (this time there was an opera singer) as well as outside (jugglers, magicians), see great food dishes being prepared (two huge paellas were being cooked) and wander around the different stalls and shops.

Once hunger is no longer ignorable, make your way back up towards Covent Garden Tube Station, but turn right at the road before you get there. You will see the Bridge of Aspiration twirling across the road linking the two buildings together. Head underneath this, past the Ballet school, and on your left will be The Masala Zone. Have lunch at this great Indian restaurant (try the Thali plate of assorted flavours) to get back your stamina for the next part of the tour.

Now head back to the tube station you arrived at. If you are feeling up to it, take the stairs going down (be warned, this is more strenuous on the back of your legs than climbing up them), Go down on the piccadilly line (the purple one) towards Heathrow Airport and get off at Green Park. Here you need to change onto the jubilee line, towards Stratford/Greenwich. Get off at Canary Wharf.

Canary Wharf is a very modern area of the London Docks, with high glass buildings housing some of the country's most influential financial institutions. You need to head along the road following the signs for the DLR (Docklands Light Railway).

Go up to the platform for the DLR going towards Lewisham/Greenwich. Get in the back of the train if there are spare seats (there is no driver), as the train will leave the way it entered.
Traveling higher than street level is great for looking around this area, especially with the sun reflecting off the buildings and water. Leave the train at Island Gardens and walk towards the river. Here you have a lovely view across the Thames to Greenwich (pronounced Grenich) on the other side.

Now go into the circular building and go down the stairs into the tunnel (not as many stairs as Covent Garden tube). Walking along the tunnel just think of the amount of water flowing above you with a few feet of solid concrete and metal between you...

When you get out at the other side, you are in Greenwich. Follow the road, and the signs, into the town centre and towards the observatory. When you reach the entrance to the park, walk along the right hand path enjoying the green grass and the people relaxing. You will see a steep incline on the right hand side, which you should go up. Once you reach the top, you deserve a sit down on one of the benches overlooking the town. From here you can see the Millenium Dome, the town of Greenwich, and in the distance Canary Wharf.

Once you've relaxed a little, go down the path you just came up, and follow the path to the right to go up the other hill (it has steps). At the top of here you will find the Greenwich Observatory, which is where the GMT line can be found (look through the railings if you don't want to enter).

Once you've maybe looked around the observatory, head back down through the park to the gates that you arrived at. Now is the time to make up for those walks, and head into one of the pubs for a local ale, and maybe a bite to eat.

Once you have finished, you can get the DLR to Canary Wharf (straight from Greenwich, no need to walk under the tunnel again - sorry, did I forget to mention that?), and the tube to where you want to carry on to.

Scannable Zebras, Controversial Stamps, The Germans Are Coming

2011-04-11T07:20:00.001Z

Finally, what life has been lacking since the invention of the barcode scanner has become reality. Yes, you can now find the price of zebras (or verify it's the same one) as scientists in Chicago and Princeton have developed a zebra scanner !

You can get a tea-towel, mug, t-shirt, and of course, stamps to celebrate the upcoming Royal Wedding. However, what you might not have been expecting were the New Zealand stamps that allow you to tear Kate and William apart. Not the most diplomatic of moves...

The weekend also saw Christiane come over and visit. Walking around Oxford, visiting Magdalen College (pronounced maudlin), topping up at the old sweet shop, and of course, having lunch at Jamie's. The weather also played along with some nice sun and reasonable temperatures. A trip was also made to London, details of which will follow in my forthcoming London Trips guide. All in all, a great weekend !

Of course, you can see the photos from these trips over on the right hand side of this blog, where you can confirm the good weather yourself :)

Sit back, relax and listen

2011-04-07T18:42:00.001Z

It has come to my attention through one of the few comments left behind by visitors to this site, that since the change of style, content and location, some of you were actually hoping for a more comparative study of the differences between living in Oxford and living in Mainz (thanks, Carlitos).

One reason this has been left out so far, is the fact that I am not exactly unbiased, and wouldn't want to offend too many people. But then again, since when has that stopped me?

So without further ado, I will include a couple of comparisons, and try to keep them in the future posts.

First up, Sundays. In Mainz these mostly consisted of walking down to the river and then walking back, as long as the weather was good. Otherwise they would be spent at home wondering when the rain was going to stop. Here the forgotten shopping gets done at the supermarket, cycle trips to local villages for a pub lunch, trips into Oxford to see the current festivals (this weekend is the chocolate festival and the Oxford Literary Festival), and we haven't even ventured over to the river yet...

Another comparison would be the food. I know that lots of people have pretty bad ideas of English cuisine, whether through the school exchange family only feeding them fast food, or the many articles (Daily Mail-esque) and TV programmes showing some dysfunctional family feeding their kids burgers, frozen fries and ketchup (Jamie Oliver is of course doing a good job of changing the TV-watcher's impression of English food). Of course there are people that do live like this, but that is the case in any country, and if you don't move in those circles, you won't experience that here either.

So what does one typically do for food over here? Well, typically is a difficult concept. Meat is a popular foodstuff bought at the butchers or local supermarket. And unlike Germany's choices of pork and chicken, we have a huge selection of beef and lamb too. It's not just the selection, but the quality as well. Last weekend I spoke to a lady from Spain who was selling tapas, and her husband who was from Germany and grilling meat, and they both said that they were amazed by the quality of the meat over here. The husband was astounded to see the cows moving freely in an open field, get slaughtered and the meat packed up for the supermarkets whilst it is still warm. As opposed to the cows being stuck in cages and it being days before their meat is actually shipped off to anywhere to be packed, which he was used to back home.

Of course I could go on for ages on the food subject, but I think this might start to bore you, my beloved reader. So maybe I should just give some examples of what we have eaten, and where we have been (it's not all pork and potatoes here...).

If you're not convinced, photos will surely follow...

Moving along

2011-04-02T11:45:00.003Z

What a week! Seeing The Canterbury Tales at the local theatre (very amusing), cycling around Yarnton (keeping fit), and enjoying the sunshine. It definitely looks like summer is on it's way...

From an administrative view, I have taken the time limits off the polls on the right of this blog, so that if you didn't happen to read it within a week of being published (why not?) you can still cast your vote ! They now default to a whole year.

Also you will see the ability to follow new posts by email, just fill in your email address and let the blog come to you.

A new section has also been created to keep you up to date on mobile apps of interest. At the moment they link to the owner's own page, but in time they will point to my reviews of the one's I have installed and tried out.

And for those of you wanting to know how many other people have been viewing this site recently, there is now a number and small graphic depicting the number of visitors over the last 7 days.

Monday saw a surprise visit from Martin and Sybille as they decided to go for a quick trip from Wuerzburg to London via Oxford. It was great to catch up with them after so long and to hear their amazing news. Now for the preparations...

This weekend sees Broad Street taken up with the chocolate festival, which should be great for lent...

Last but not least, who could forget that today is Diego's birthday ! Why not go onto facebook and send him your wishes.

Stop counting those calories...

Flatulant Dentists, Takeaway Jobs Ban and Gardening Vice

2011-03-25T10:46:00.002Z

Straight onto the news today. A dentist has been reprimanded after coworkers and patients complaining about him breaking wind. Apparently he found liked to do it whilst his employees were on lunch break. Although the case is being judged by the medical council, I think it might be an interesting prospect if he was put in a cell for a few days. I'm sure his habit would stop pretty quickly then...

According to our friend Hugo (not Victor, Chavez), capitalism killed the martians. Yes, he must have kept hidden some compelling evidence to come up with that one. Maybe it's stored in the same place as the proof that the big bang was a western attempt at taking over Venezuela?

In a blow to cheap takeaways filling up our streets, the government has prohibited migrants from outside the EEA coming to the UK in order to work in takeaways. Yes, no longer will the server of your kebab or vindaloo be a person of non-EEA descent, just the food itself...

On that same theme, police are looking for an 18kg stick of kebab meat that was stolen from a takeaway in Trowbridge. If you see someone walking around the city with a huge piece of meat under their clothes, you might be sensible not to get too close, especially when it starts defrosting...

Visitors to Hamburg will soon be able to travel directly from the Garden Show grounds to the Reeperbahn via cable car if plans go ahead. No longer will you be forced to wander around watching meaningless flowers all day, but hop on to the cable car telling your wife you'll meet up with her in a couple of hours...

On a sad note, the BBC Caribbean radio service has been stopped due to funding cuts. Let's hope someone high up realises the effect this will have on independent news service in this region, and will relaunch it soon.

If you thought that the defense cuts that took place in the UK were a good way of saving money, you might want to read this article which discusses the role of the UK military in Libya, and the effects the choices in the cuts have meant to our ability to play any military role in the future. Seems a pretty compelling point of view...

And if you are filling in your census forms on the 27th March, before you have fun writing down Jedi as your religion etc, you might want to pause for a moment over the words "your data is protected for 100 years". This used to be the case, indeed the data from the census 100 years ago is now available for perusal. But, there was not a labour government around then who was whittling away all privacy of the population. Laws that came into effect after the previous labour government lost the election, and before the new coalition came in, mean that although your data COULD be kept private for 100 years, it is not guaranteed to be so. In fact, the list of the people who can use and pass on this data is nearly as astounding as how little chance you have to know what has been passed o to whom. Hopefully someone in this government is listening and wants to take up the case to reverse some of these privacy-stealing laws...

Now where is my Guy Fawkes mask?...

When the Cure is worse than the Problem

2011-03-12T17:14:00.001Z

As men get older, they start to worry about losing their hair (especially it seems, if they are of Valencian descent). Many resort to medical treatments to try and get that fluffy stuff back up on the coconut, sometimes with success. However it has now been claimed that the chemicals used for these treatments have actually been found to cause the user to become impotent. Yes, before you spray, maybe it's worth considering the consequences fully...

Ever wonder why some languages have held on, despite all the odds, then an interesting piece of research has been published, claiming there is a mathematical formula to work out if a language will survive living alongside another more prominent one. Maybe that will make the welsh feel safe again...

Now for those of you who are fans of Jamie Oliver. On his website he is currently offering free recipe books in return for filling in a short survey. Go on, tell him what you think !

Another great saver for those of you with Thames Water. They are currently giving away some fancy shower heads, plus other water saving devices. Just fill in your details here and you'll be sent them through the post. No cheaper way to save money...

Despite only one entry in the last poll, I persevere and have made a few changes to the site to hopefully make it more appealing to you. Gone is the Google AdWords bar, as well as the Amazon search widgets. Nobody was using them, so I presume nobody will miss them. The polls were becoming a bit difficult to read in a half-width column, so I have now made them full-width. Hope you approve.

Talking of polls, this week's is asking whether there should be a section to list the current special offers I think you will be interested in? At the moment they have mentioned in the blog posts individually, but if you skim-read (why? surely the content is worth reading in it's entirety?) you might not have realised that you could be saving money, receiving free things, or having a cheap holiday. As a taster I will put it in already, and you can let me know what you think (more detailed feedback can always be written in a comment).

Get voting !

Murcian Visits, Palacial Deals, and Thrice Uncle

2011-03-12T16:47:00.001Z

Last weekend saw murcian Ali come and visit us in Oxford. We had a full program organised, so no sooner had she got off the bus, we set off to Bicester Village, the famous high class shopping outlets. Of course despite the 70% discounts, many of the products are still in a league of their own. No sooner had we found a good selection of jackets for Ali, than the price tags of over 400 pounds came into view. But it makes for a great excursion if you leave your credit card at home.

A cup-cake fair for neighbour Kate's London Marathon run to raise money for St. John Ambulance was also supported, coming away with a box selection of them for later :)

A trip down to London was also in order, meeting up with Andres and heading off for Camden Town. Despite it being a Sunday, this place was heaving, as always, and it really made for a lively atmosphere whilst wandering around the markets. We didn't find the Arepa&Co stall, but were filled up with the huge plates of Chinese food that were mixed for us. We made our way through the clothes, food and chucherias, and headed back towards the City. Buckingham Palace was passed, as well as a leisurely walk through the park until we got to Westminster to take a look at the Houses of Parliament, Big Ben's tower (we didn't visit Little Ben) and then went off to Chinatown via Leicester Square, stopping for a cup of tea and piece of cake. Wow, what a full day that was!

The sun came out on Monday, which is why it was perfect for a visit to Woodstock (England, not the festival in the US). After a filling late lunch at one of the local pubs we visited Blenheim Palace (where, incidentally, they currently give you a free annual pass when you buy an entry ticket). The history of Sir Winston Churchill, plus of the palace itself makes for a very entertaining tour of the building. Of course the grounds are also quite amazing, so we'll be using that annual pass to have a picnic in the summer.

There have of course been many birthdays in between posts, including those of Jordi, Lourdes, and Javi. Felicidades to you all !

And to top off the week, it seems I have become an uncle for the third time. Welcome to the world, Mary-Jane !

The Non-Carnival Planner

2011-03-06T09:06:00.002Z

In Barranquilla they're singing curramba whilst dancing in the sun, in Mainz they're shouting Helau! whilst marching through the streets, and here we're not doing anything of the sort. Yes, londoners like to celebrate carnival too, but aren't as mad as the Rhinelanders, and decide to celebrate in August when it's nice and hot (relatively speaking).

Further to the mention in my last post about the breast milk ice cream, it appears the police have now stopped the sale of these products pending further investigation.

The Panama Canal took a long time to build, many were killed through disease whilst building, and everything that could have gone wrong did. But now there might be an alternative in the pipeline. Colombia is apparently in talks with China to build an alternative passage from the Pacific to the Atlantic. It will be interesting to see how the planning comes along, and if as many problems occur. Let's just hope it doesn't have as many leaks as the Yangtse Dam did when it was finished...

And this week a call goes out to Carlitos who is off visiting Luigi in Paris. Let the Louvre be warned...

On a final note, you have just 12 hours to vote in the latest poll on this page...

The alternative side of the news

2011-02-27T21:01:00.001Z

It's hard to read or see anything different on the news as so much space and time is being taken up by revolutions, protests, and meerkats selling car insurance. Right, I thought, now it's time for me to publish some more of my really important alternative news stories of the week.

First up is Watson. No, not Sherlock's great sidekick, but rather a special supercomputer from IBM that has just finished beating the best contestants at the American game show Jeopardy. Yes, this machine was so clever at finding the correct answers (or questions) that it will probably be spending the rest of its life relaxing on some desert island with the winnings it made.

Talking about science, the Royal Society has published its annual report and said that there aren't enough schoolchildren studying scientific A-Level subjects, and the ones that do aren't helped by the lack of motivated teachers. This is leading to a never-ending spiral of film-studies and 14th century badminton rackets students . Okay, maybe their aren't that many types badminton rackets in the 14th century, but there definitely weren't any fast food burger joints offering degrees then either.

On a royal note, anything planned for the must-be-seen-at wedding in April this year? Well, for want of something unusual to write home about, why not visit Abingdon. This city will be having a bun fight in celebration of the occasion, catapulting thousands of currant buns from the rooftop of their city hall to the crowds gathered below. Just make sure you're wearing a hard hat in case they have had to bake them weeks in advance...

Not quite such a seamless link to this next story, but if you venture down to Covent Garden in the near future, you might get a shock when ordering an ice-cream. A parlour has started selling their deserts made from human breast milk rather than cow's. If tasting something which you haven't tried since you were born is not for you, you can always give some yourself. They pay for your milk in order to keep their ice-cream business up and running...

Remember the Russian spy caught in the US last year? Ever wondered what people get up to after being unveiled? Well, apparently they get employed to design the space suits for the next cosmonauts...

Other interesting news coming from that scientific centre in the East: Just under a third of Russians interviewed believe that the Sun revolves around the Earth. Yes, no riding on back of turtles or being flat for them. In addition, the majority said that all radioactivity is man-made, and 29% said that humans fought the dinosaurs for control of planet earth.

Animals sometimes seem so close to us humans though. Take monkeys. Some women would argue that most men are still closely related to these mammals. A further explanation has recently arisen, in that they have been found to wash themselves with their own urine. Before the females amongst you start saying "I told you so", the reason cited for this behaviour is that it makes them more attractive to the female monkeys. What does that say about you now? :)

If you decide to go off to the cinema to try and forget about that last piece of news, then be careful with your manners. In Latvia a viewer was shot dead after eating his popcorn too loudly. The rumours that this happened during the erotic parts of the Black Swan are as yet unconfirmed.

On a food note, the EU has given the humble Cornish Pasty a protected status just like Champagne, Parma Ham, and Stilton Cheese. So next time you go out to buy one, check it has the correct authenticity.

For those of you of an inventive nature, you'll be pleased to find out that something sought by thousands of students has finally been invented. Yes, a cocktail-dispensing-slot-machine. Play this one armed bandit and be rewarded with non-historic concoctions like a Long Island Beach or a Green Virgin Slammer...

And finally to something personal. As the last poll attracted a grand total of one participant, I think you've had enough of being asked what to do with this site. So I will make the changes from a democratic-dictatorship position and stop pestering you.

What about Mainz, you might ask? What's different about Oxford? Well, currently it's a lot milder here and we haven't seen snow since early Jan, whereas I have been reliably informed that there was some of that white stuff over in the Rhineland just last week. Being able to compare the Irish pubs is another major thing. Here you get the usual great Irish beers, as well as a couple of English ones too. Bu there is no fast-food ordering service from the place next door. No, sir. Here they cook you a lovely Irish Stew, or Steak and Guiness Pie, all served with the seasonal vegetables, just to make sure you have something healthy too. Has that whet your appetite yet Carlitos?? :)

Oscars tonight - better get the sparkling wine out...

The Results Are In

2011-02-06T11:46:00.002Z

Tunisia might have fallen, Egypt might be on the brink, and many other countries might be shaking in their boots, but here in this little corner of the cyberworld democracy has prevailed. Yes, the votes have been cast, the numbers counted, and the bribes ignored. I am therefore pleased to announce that this blog will be updated more often on a weekly basis. The fact that 3 voters consumed but did not inhale also pleases me.

So as promised I will unveil a bit of what's been happening recently. Christmas 2010 was spent in Wiesbaden, being Julianna's first celebration of this type we were allowed to enjoy it with her, her parents (Mark and Friedi), Christiane and the rest of the family. Snow was above the knee, cars were getting stuck, but it really was a great white Christmas, the like of which not seen for many years. Some photos of this event can be found here.

A trip up north was also on the cards the week before Xmas to see Doug, Gem, Dominic, Mia-Rose and bump. This was when the big snows had just started, but luckily we were not too badly affected. Some of the pictures can be seen here (including Olga enjoying the snow...).

New Year was spent here in Oxford with the lovely company of Ali, Luigi and Roberto. Typical tourist things took place like getting on the open top double decker bus to tour around the city (that was cold), visiting a good few traditional pubs, and some traditional British food for new year (yes, we did Indian). To check out some of the sights you could come and visit us, or just look at the photos here.

January also saw some familiar faces with cousin Jonathan and Sally being over here from Australia, and using that as an excuse to meet up with them, Juliette, Arnaud and Mariette, Clive and Wend. A great Spanish meal was had by all, although I think more time was spent catching up than actually eating...

And does Harald still appear in Neighbours? Apparently not (although his photo is still on the website), but Lou Carpenter, Paul Robinson, Karl Kennedy, Toadfish, and the lovely Libby are still there. Of course, it's never going to be the same without Charlene (aka Kylie Minogue).

I see that the the number of visitors has been going up steadily (not sure if it's because of my improving writing style, or just people are starting to wake up after a new year stuper). Thanks for that :)

You will also notice that on the right hand side of this page there are a couple of boxes from Amazon (one for UK, the other for Germany) and a Google ad column further down. These are little ways in helping to finance this site when people order anything through these links. However, according to my statistics, nobody actually uses them. So this leads to the next quiz: What would you prefer to have appear on the right of this site?
Maybe you like the idea of being able to buy via Amazon straight from this site, maybe you find some of the adverts from Google interesting, or maybe you want a list of great offers and links carefully picked by yours truly? Cast your vote and let me know !

One last thing before I let you get back to your Sunday papers: There is actually a button below each post allowing you to write your comments, post to facebook, tweet and email. Please use them! Nothing like getting the word out :)

Change is in the air

2011-01-27T22:54:00.001Z

Winter might seem to be on the way out, letting spring into 2011, but that's not the only change that has happened. In fact, the other change has been the main culprit which has stopped posts being published on this blog.

If you hadn't noticed the change of heading, then maybe you should just give up now. Yes, This blogger has pulled up his roots, slung them over his shoulder and left on a mule. Well, sort of. After a good many years writing from the German city of Mainz, the wind has changed and posts will now be written from the wonderful city of Oxford, Great Britain.
If you think this might affect my writing style, then you might be correct. But it couldn't get much worse now, could it?

And in the chaos of the move, the new life, culture and bureaucracy, a new leaf will be turned, democracy fulfilled and some people sighing relief. Yes, YOU get to decide!
First decision you can influence is how often updates to this blog should be written? I know it's not the most frequently written page, and that most of you have probably given up (website analytics tell me it's about a tenth of what it used to be in it's heyday back in 2001), but maybe you don't have time to read it every day anyway. In fact, maybe you just subscribe to the RSS feed and don't visit the page at all. So in the interests of information gathering I have created two polls for you just over on the right hand side of the page. Please fill them in with your feedback, you have a week to show there is more than the three people that answered in the last two polls...

So what happened at Christmas 2010? How was the New Year 2011 celebrated? And is Harold still in neighbours? All this and more in the next post, coming to you...when you decide ! (a bit like on-demand viewing but fewer buttons).

Cast your votes !

2010-10-18T11:43:00.001Z

Paella, Pa'ella, Pa'mi

First up, Lobelto now has a place in Mainz! Yes, he couldn't have chosen a better place except if it came with a ladyfriend included. So by the end of the month we should be seeing a lot more of him...

Saturday saw the latest Seacava Paella. This time cooked and organised by Ali and Mamen. Without wanting to put down the retired paella maker (Carlitos), it tasted great. Despite the slightly late start, the assembled group ate and ate, and drank and drank until there were only a few doggy bags to take home for the next day's dinner. After this filling meal, a trip to Haddocks was undertaken, where it ended at 2am with Lobelto asleep in the corner and a lot of burros playing cards. Pity that the following day had to be spent washing all the clothes as a table of guests saw fit to flout the no-smoking laws during our time there.

On another note, it looks like Jordi (yes, of 2000/01 fame) has been given a job in Brussels now where he will be doing what he does best. Good luck !

And now for something different - news related. What with Angela Merkel admitting that the German method of integration of foreigners has been a disaster, how do you feel? Go on, have a go. Hopefully more than the previous 3 will respond...

2010-09-26T21:32:00.000Z

Licensed to Live

This last week has seen Olga complete her studies as a psychologist, and Rafa graduate as an electrical engineer. So if you have problems with your life or mind, see the former, and if you have problems with your TV or the computer see the latter.

You might have noticed an addition to the right hand side of this blog. Yes, the polls are back, asking you those relevant and important questions on life. So go on, give it a go!

2010-09-18T16:02:00.001Z

Website Fun, Dirty Pavements and Bottle Deposits

Nowadays everyone has a website, they are so easy to create. There are few companies that don't have some form of online presence, and most allow you to order their products or services directly. I like to call this user interaction. Well Hema (a dutch department store) brings this interactivity to a new dimension with their e-store here: http://producten.hema.nl/. This is going back to the roots of website building - for fun and enjoyment. Well done to the person that programmed that, and to the company for letting it go past prototype stage!

Now people say that we Brits are dog lovers. This is probably true, but I am sure that the Germans give us a run for our money. I remember when I first came over here to Mainz. I was walking along when I saw a mother with a young child in a pushchair and a dog on a leash. She stopped at the entrance of a supermarket, and to my astonishment, she tied up the pushchair to a lamppost and took the dog on the leash into the store with her. That's something that can only happen here.
Dogs can go anywhere. They are regularly taken into restaurants, supermarkets, swimming pools, which personally I don't find all that appealing. It will be of no surprise then, that I often come across a pile of dog turd in the street. Yes, there is a law forbidding them to leave a mess without the owner cleaning up, but with so many dogs about, how are you going to stop them all?
So the other day I was walking across the city and started to count how many different piles of poo I had to avoid. On this half hour walk which I repeat most days, I counted no less than 9 different dollops. This is getting ridiculous! Of course the reason why I decided to write about it now was that earlier this week, whilst carefully avoiding one steaming mess I accidentally trod in another. Next time I see a dog even bending it's leg in preparation for a squat, I am going to get out my camera and make sure a big flash goes off. Maybe some owners will learn to take control...

Talking of cameras, I am seriously considering having one permanently to hand whilst crossing zebra crossings in this city. At least twice a week I ma nearly hit because cars like to race across them rather than stop for pedestrians. Legally they have to stop as soon as my foot treads on the crossing, but in Mainz they like to speed up and keep driving across, despite being mere centimeters away from me. So be warned - next time I will have my camera to hand and there will be a nice clear photo being sent to the local police station.

So the UK is currently considering putting deposits on bottles of drink, like they did about 40 years ago. This of course is nothing new to the people of Germany who have had deposits on drinks bottles for as long as I cam remember. Although I have to admit they have changed the law a good many times as to which types of bottles have which type of deposit, and whether you have to take them back to the very same store you bought them from, with your receipt and a token (luckily that is no more).
But back to the UK. The main reason being touted for deposits being necessary, is that it would reduce the amount of litter on the streets. I don't have the statistics for the percentage of litter being made up of bottles, but I would hazard a guess at maybe 5% from what I personally remember seeing.
Now jump to Germany again. Asking a few locals gives differing answers with respect to if it helped the littering problem. Some say that it did, and there's less broken glass on the streets now (although if this were true, the streets must have been paved with glass before, as I still have to avoid at least 3 broken bottles on my daily walk - maybe I should do a proper count like with the dog turds). Others say that now instead of a few bottles on the ground, there a re many more vagrants combing the bins around the city, looking for any spare bottles. They will habitually empty out a bin whilst getting to glass container at the very bottom, which of course might mean that there's less glass on the street as a percentage of litter, but the amount of litter on the street has gone up considerably.
So I'm all for new ways to get our streets cleaner (personally believing that people who litter should be punished by having to clear up the town for at least a day for every piece they threw down) but maybe people should look beyond what the direct effects could be, and think of the side-effects too, to make an informed decision of whether the total balance is beneficial or not.

As a final note, for the doctor who recently celebrated his birthday and who used to be a frequent visitor to this site - welcome back !

2010-09-12T06:35:00.000Z

The bane of malfunctioning credit card machines

To accompany the new design to this site, how about a bit of new content style too? That question was rhetorical, by the way :)

So in case you don't know, in Germany it is hard to pay for goods and services with credit cards. Big stores normally accept them, but otherwise you might just have a chance with the so called EC card. This is basically a debit card instead of the normal VISA debit cards etc one is used to.

Actually, an example I always like to give to people on the use of cards in Germany, is at a supermarket a couple of years ago. I was in the line to buy my groceries and as often happens, there is some special offer on some home electronics (or a chainsaw, but that's another story) this day there was a huge flatscreen TV on sale. It had a pricetag of around 550 Euros. And sure enough, the customer started to count out lots of fifty notes into the cashier's hand. And the cashier didn't flinch once - this is normal here !!!

But I digress, the card readers.

So to pay for a meal for instance, like in other non EC-card countries, a machine is brought out and the card inserted or swiped. The machine sends the details per wireless or cable to the base station where it checks with the payment authority if this card is valid. Then the customer is asked to either enter their PIN, or to sign a receipt.

Now I'm not the oldest person I know, but I remember this happening in some form for at least 10 years (pubs at uni accepted cards, don't you know). And I don't remember once ever having a problem with them.

Now wind forward to the present. Last night was the second time in two days (and on average I would say at least twice a month) when trying to pay for a meal in a restaurant (knowing full well they accept cards, so I don't bother making the treck to the bank to take out extra cash) that the waitress comes back and says sorry the machine isn't working today.

I know I long gave up on everything being so efficient here as people are led to believe, but I had hoped that at least this problem could just be a freak occurrence. So, we could be in the most rustic village in the middle of Spain, and the machines worked without a hitch, but here in Mainz they seem to have a malfunctioning rate of about one a week. Shouldn't someone investigate this? Did they get these machines on special discount from Aldi? Maybe they need to be sent to China to be repaired?

I think next time this happens I'll just give them my address and tell them to send me the bill. That way I don't have to do 3 trips to the bank a day...

So, about that chainsaw...

2010-08-29T15:15:00.001Z

Lost but not forgotten

So I might have neglected this blog for a while now. No excuses, just lack of time. Well this weekend has been used to update the look of this site, which hadn't changed since I started it in 2001 (that's 9 years ago !!!) time. Hope you approve...

2010-03-14T13:31:00.003Z

Dangerous Cheese, Spyclists, and the Purple People

So I've blogged before about the escapades of rolling cheese down a hill and people getting hurt trying to catch it. Well apparently it got too much, and this year's rolling has had to be called off. Next they will be banning egg-and-spoon-races...

The Shambles, in York, has been named Britain's most picturesque street, beating Bath's Royal Crescent into second place. Definitely worth a visit if you up that way...

You've heard of the warning about spies in our mists during the war. Loose tongues cost lives and the like. Well, what you might not have heard about, were the German touring cycle groups, which apparently went around the areas of possible invasions, to take note of the potential targets, and possible hostilities in the area. Is that why they love cycling so much in Germany?...

Movement is afoot in Italy. Not about the Vatican and the sex abuse claims, but rather on the political front. They don't have their own political party, but the Purple People are a large group of people that apparently formed through Facebook to show their dislike of Berlusconi. They have organised protests with hundreds of thousands of demonstrators turning out, all wearing something purple. It might not be a direct competition for the upcoming elections, but they do have a voice, and one which is getting louder by the day. It will be interesting to see when they reach a critical mass, how the current leader can cope (except for using violence of course)...

There once was a lovely village set in the middle of green pastures, where one could relax without noisy motorways, airports etc nearby. This Area of Natural Beauty is called the Chilterns. And this will no longer be the case if the government has its way and creates their new High Speed Rail Link between London and Birmingham going straight through this greenbelt area. Start joining the protests now...

And the Rugby. The latest Six Nations game is underway at the moment, France vs Italy, and then the final matches are being played next Saturday, which we will hopefully be able to enjoy with Luca, Carlitos, Luigi and a possible show by Lobelto. Then we will have to wait for the World Cup in South Africa...

2010-02-21T11:34:00.002Z

Carnival Thaw

So the carnivals have drawn to an end. This year there actually seemed to be less broken glass on the ground...could it be fewer bottles were smashed? Or they were quicker in cleaning up? Or did the cold weather keep many people at home? I don't know the answer, but it was a nice surprise on the Tuesday morning to not have to pick glass splinters out of my shoes when I arrived at the office.

Of course, cold weather was never a problem in Barranquilla, where their carnival took place at 34 degrees celsius.

As most people are still recovering on the Tuesday after carnival, I suspect they forgot that it's also known as Pancake Day. Yes, you should pick up all your leftovers and use them as filling for the pancakes you make. Tasty...

Google StreetView has appeared in this blog a few times. And here it is again. This time the video-car came across something in Norway that was very unexpected...just take a look at this link.

Well, Luca is back in Germany, this time in Bochum, so maybe there will be a meetup again, once the weather has warmed up a bit.

Keep those woollies on...

2010-01-24T17:04:00.002Z

Pricey Ham, Evils of Playstation, and Airport Security

Selfridges has decided that there are some people out there who would pay an arm and a leg for a nice piece of ham. They have put up for sale a piece costing 1800 pounds. Yes, that's pounds, not pesetas...

Amongst all the worrying things that the current president of Venezuela has done (taking over anything and everything) is the attack on the Sony Playstation. Yes, that's right, Chavez has decided that this piece of technology is evil. A bit like the pot calling the kettle black...

So after the latest attempt to blow up an airliner it's become all the rage to bring in the nudity scanners in airports. You know the ones - you walk through and the attendant no longer asks you if you have a canoe in your pocket. Well, in principle, the better you get at detecting these things, the safer for us, right? Well, it would be if humans were not part of this equation. Just take Munich airport (go on, take it). They have the explosives detection in place to work on laptops, and the machine says that this laptop was probably in touch with explosive substance. Well that should be the end of it you may think. Inspect the guy thoroughly until you are sure it was just a false positive. Well, no. The human element lets this guy take his laptop and walk away into the (security cleared) area of the airport. Here he can board a plane, make a transit in another country and not get rechecked.
So it doesn't really matter if we have to pass through a scanner completely naked, get all our orifices checked and have sniffer dogs all over us. In the end the human element will allow mistakes to happen. So what should we do? Well, maybe we should just sit back and await all the status updates that these new scanner machines could generate on twitter...oh, nobody told you they were attached to a SIM card?...

Travel safely...

2010-01-17T18:13:00.002Z

Certain Weather, Riot Sledging and Chavez Stores

Whilst the weather here can't make up it's mind (finally the snow had cleared for 2 days and then in 2 hours 2 inches of snow had fallen in Mainz yesterday evening) let's have a look at what's been happening in the world.

A novel new use of police riot shields has been found in Oxfordshire. After a heavy snowfall with most people being snowed in, a couple of bobbies decided to take to the slopes on their aforementioned protective gear. Looks like fun, although that didn't last once their boss got wind of their escapades...

After devaluing the Venezualen currency last week, Chavez ordered soldiers to take to the streets and take over shops not offering their wares at their recent lower value. Is there anything this man won't keep his hands off?

Ever wondered what that whiff was when you drive out of London? Well it could quite easily be the recycling of sewage, which has been saving millions of pounds a year, and generated 14% of Thames Water's energy. Other ideas for recycling it as lip-gloss haven't gone down too well though...

Just left to say that the earthquake in Haiti has been taking up most of the news lately. Let's hope they manage to sort out the supply dispersion quickly enough to save as many lives as possible of those that are left...

Think before you apply that make-up...

2010-01-09T18:47:00.002Z

Lidl Drugs, Bean PM, and Y2010 Bugs

If you're going shopping at Lidl in Spain, maybe you should take a closer look at that package of bananas you put in your trolley after one kilo bags of cocaine were found to be hidden in amongst the fruit. I suppose there's going to be someone that's not too happy about losing so much powder, and then there's going to be someone who's very happy with their latest banana trifle ;)

Spain's PM, Zapatero has often been likened to TV personality Mr Bean. So it was a funny surprise to see that a hacker had exchanged the PM's photo on his website for the new EU presidency for that of the comic. It would be interesting to find out how many people had seen the site without realising there had been a switch...

Ten years ago, you heaved a sigh of relief, that after so many reports of the world coming to an end, the millenium actually started with very few technical hickups. Pity the people with German cards then, who woke up on the 1st of Jan 2010 and tried to pay for their shopping, take out money from the ATM, or were on holiday trying to pay for that expensive meal they just ate - and finding out that there's a technical glitch with the chips on their cards and they don't work. Well this happened to around 30 million German card holders, who were without resolve until yesterday. Of course, this comes on top of the fact that in November last year, over 100 thousand German credit cards had to be recalled after there was a security breach in the payment system, and they were being used without the owners consent.

Well, there's been a lot of snow chaos going on all over Europe, temperatures reaching -22 degrees, airports being closed, planes being cancelled, lorries and cars in pile-ups and accidents, and water pipes bursting. If it wasn't so cold out there I'd take some photos and put them up, but you'll have to make do with this link to the BBC article here.

Wrap up well !

2009-12-19T12:37:00.002Z

Cheese Charge, Being Swedish and Marmite Thefts

So, what's being going on this winter so far? After having the family over for Christmas Markets visit (and Clive getting addicted to the Glow Juice), Tati and Jan got married, and we had the first snow.

In fact, the first snow happened yesterday with -4 degrees, and despite being predicted, caused large scale chaos in Mainz. The buses were all held up as the city came to a standstill with the roads all gridlocked for about 4 hours. The roads and pavements were of course not gritted, so became sheets of black ice, and the emergency vehicles couldn't get through the traffic. This morning we had -13 degrees...

Hopefully you're not traveling off to Hong Kong with Cathay Pacific, as it is currently having problems with mysterious toilet blockages on it's flights. If you are traveling these holidays, then now you know why the extra sick bags can be found in front of you...

You either love it or you hate it, but this saying is being brought to extremes as a petrol station manager is having to lock away his jars of marmite behind the counter after they were targeted in multiple robberies. It is not mentioned whether the assailants were armed with twiglets...

Ever wondered what being Swedish is all about? Well according to a local politician part of it is the ability to swing both ways in the same day. If you want the more detailed and exact definition she gave, check out this link.

The Cosmopolitan has some sound advice for those of you wanting to make sure you do everything possible not to catch the swine flu: avoid the missionary position - adopt the reverse cowgirl. Nice to know that they are thinking of our best interests...

The financial crisis is having it's effects felt everywhere. In Aachen, Germany a 74 year-old man and a 53 year-old woman disagreed about possession of the trolley. So to sort it out the woman got hold of a 4 pound wedge of parmesan cheese, and used it as a dagger, whilst the man counter-attacked with a stick of salami. The woman had to be treated for a cracked head at the end of the day. It is not mentioned who ended up with the trolley, nor what products were obviously so valuable...

History has been made by a man in the US who was put away in jail at the age of 19 for 35 years, only to be freed now on DNA evidence. Looking at the t-shirt he was wearing, maybe the police could have gotten a clue t his innocence a bit earlier on...

Well, nothing like freezing at home, wondering when the summer will come (or some more glow-juice, hey Clive?).

Wrap up warm...

2009-11-21T17:24:00.004Z

Spanish Helping Hand, Stolen Cafe and Female Blue Pills

Government education plans have always been criticized as too simple, too difficult or too expensive. Well the Spanish region of Extremadura has hit the headlines after they have put forward 14000 euros for booklets telling children how to go solo (and no, I'm not talking about flying across the channel). It's not mentioned whether they get practical lessons too, and if they do, whether it's in mixed classes...

Imagine going in to work one day to find the building gone. Well that's what happened to the owner of the Tip Top Tasters Cafe in Keighley. The 2.5 tonnes of building with all of it's contents went missing overnight and nobody saw anything. Next time maybe chain it to a bike rack...

Now woman are allowed to get a similar amount of spam mail as men after the discovery of a drug that is claimed to be a female viagra. Look out for the Christmas his'n her sets this December in your local pharmacy...

And finally good news for men everywhere. Alcohol is good for our hearts. In fact, according to this report, having more of it makes our hearts better still. Somehow I have a feeling this news will be shot down by various medics though...

Well, get out there and do your xmas shopping...

2009-11-03T12:47:00.002Z

Huge Meatballs, Oxford Street X, and Sexy Accents

So you thought the triple decker burgers were an exaggeration? How about a meatball that weighs in at 101 kilos ? Thankfully all that meat didn't go to waste - it was donated to a local kitchen to feed the hungry. It isn't noted, however, how many of them it managed to feed...

Oxford Circus has a new crossing. Based on a japanese design, it's based on the X shape, and apparently carries up to 70% more people across it. This blogger will be taking a look at it in the near future and be letting you know if he feels like there's 70% more space around him when he crosses it...

The Italians have been toppled ! The Irish have gone up to 1st position in the tables of sexiest accents in the world. The Scottish, Welsh and English are also in the top 10. In fact, all bar Australian and American were European accents. I suppose, had all the poor people in world also been given a chance to vote, maybe this would have changed the results. In fact, if the survey was done in more languages it would also maybe have attracted some of the more populous countries like China and India to take part. Then again, maybe they did, and still found the Irish accent the sexiest...

Ever thought bats were boring, nocturnal creatures that don't get to enjoy life? Well, think again, as the latest edition of Science has an article describing how asian bats get up to all sorts of naughty business that would put viagra-fuelled monkeys to shame. It doesn't state, though, whether this is due to them hanging upside down all day and the blood rushing to their heads...

Prepare yourself for Guy Fawkes Night...

2009-10-31T14:22:00.002Z

Childish Lemonade and Online Memories

Fentimans traditional Victorian lemonade, fermented over 7 days, has caused controversy in the US, after the natural alcohol content of 0.5% was noticed by a schoolboy in Maine. He then complained to the principal and it's escalated up through the police and the state Attorney General's office.
All this over a drink that's been legally classified as a soft drink. It makes me wonder why this kid decided to tell his principal. Was he annoyed that he wasn't getting drunk on something he saw had alcohol content on the label? Did he try drinking 16 bottles to get the equivalent of a pint of weak beer? Or did he just not like the Victorian age in his history class? Well, at least it made sales soar with all the media interest...

Ever thought that technology is all well and good, but as soon as you die, it's not really helpful anymore? In order to prove this wrong, facebook has introduced a new feature allowing you to enshrine a profile as a memorial to that person. So just wait to hear about some celebrity's profile being hacked to make it look like they've died, especially around April 1st...

On top of that, if you're not quite sure where to get burial apparel, then don't worry, Walmart now has a selection of coffins for you to order online. Start getting worried when they have them on offer "2-for-1"...

So another month draws to an end, and in the next couple of days there are a few birthdays to celebrate. Mavi with be blowing out candles on Sunday, as will Patricia on Monday. Also on Sunday, Mariette will be christened. Enjoy !

2009-10-29T12:22:00.002Z

Battle of the Whales, Healing Curry and Court (in)Security

An event until now not captured on film, the BBC have managed to witness humpback whales fighting of the female. The video is worth watching here. It's amazing how close one can get, and feel like you can touch them (without getting hurt or wet, of course).

What students have been using for decades as a hangover cure, the humble curry now seems to also have cancer-healing powers.
Now those students (who are now more grown up) have a new excuse for going down the curry house - just trying to keep healthy, my dear !

In Germany, the trial begins of a man that stabbed a muslim woman to death in a courtroom. The original case was about defamation in the playground, but obviously it's gotten a bit more serious than that now. Let's just hope that they check for weapons at the court doors this time around...

Another case of ID cards not adding up today. This time, it's been calculated from government figures about total cost of the scheme, and cost for each person, that in order to be self-financing (as the government has said it will be) there need to be 28 million people that voluntarily join the scheme (and pay up the 30 pounds for the privilege). That's nearly half of all people in Britain ! Good to know that we are talking in realistic figures then. Maybe it would have been better to join up with the national lottery, and for every ID card registered, you get a free chance at the jackpot millions? It might make it past the two thousand volunteers that signed up in Manchester then. I thought maths was obligatory at all schools. Even those which politicians go to...

Just popping out for a curry... ;)

2009-10-24T12:55:00.002Z

Celebrity Hitmen, PC Nursery Rhymes, and Messed Up Monkeys

So you are doing a show of murders that are happening in your city. Things are a bit slow. What do you do? Well, this Brazilian TV host decided to set about ordering killings which just happened to be his rivals in the drug trade. I wonder if one should start investigating Crimewatch...

Political 'correctness' is coming into the BBC now, where they've just made the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme have a happy ending. Isn't there any topic that doesn't end up being savaged by such political nonsense?

Fifteen years ago, pregnant monkeys were given cocaine. Now their middle-aged children are showing the effects. The male monkeys that were inside the womb at the time of the drug intake are impatient, and have no self control. I suppose the female monkeys were like this at this age anyway, which is why they didn't notice a difference...

Keep those monkeys happy...

2009-10-17T12:46:00.002Z

Driving Beer, PC Brain, Peruvian Food, and Conker Clampdown

We all know you shouldn't drink and drive. But how about driving your beer? That's what an German biker tried out, converting a beer crate into a sort of quad bike. Despite the police saying it was va very clever idea, they still confiscated it as an illegal vehicle. It isn't mentioned whether to go faster you have to drop balast, or drink a beer...

There are all sorts of addons for your PC. But I bet you never say a pulsating brain? Looking pretty life like, this gadget pulsates with the processor, expanding when the CPU is busy, and shrinking when it's running idle. You just have to see the video to believe it...

Peru is combatting the crisis by pushing it's food business. In fact, there are so many people interested in becoming cooks there, it's hard to find a place on a course. You could of course take the other route (preferred by this author) of just eating the food cooked by the peruvian cooks ;)
Here's waiting for some peruvian restaurants to appear around here soon...

I remember collecting a huge bag of conkers whilst doing the paper round and bringing them into school to try my luck in the one of the best playground games. It seems to have become a bit less fun nowadays, as officials in a village conker tournament in Gloucestershire have been checking all pieces of string, and putting the conkers in a vice to check that they haven't been tampered with. I suppose there will be no hot food being sold at this competition, as otherwise those unscrupulous players will be putting their conkers in the oven with vinegar to improve their chances...

Colombia is attracting tourists to an area that until recently was impossible to visit due to security fears. La Macarena is an area of natural beauty with it's famed red-tinted water, which is now attracting visitors doing eco-tourism. Hopefully this can keep up and the income can help to make more areas of this amazing country accessible to others...

Are you a fan of Friends? Or rather, were you? Well head down to London where they have built the Central Perk coffee shop and fitted it out with all the props that were seen on the set. Of course, the couch is the most attractive of them all to the visitors, as most of the filming was done on there, so get a drink, sit back and remember those good times...

Ever wondered what all the fuss was about in the playground when the latest fashion accessory is some cheapy plastic wristband? Well, wonder no more, as this article (commenting on an article in the Sun) explains it all. Just makes you wonder what really is going on behind those innocent faces...

The Wisconsin Tourism Federation has decided to change it's name that it has had since 1979 after realising that it might mean something else now. WTF will now be known as TFW (Tourism Federation of Wisconsin). Maybe they should have checked the meaning of this new acronym as well, as this page shows...

Now let's get those winter clothes out...

2009-10-17T11:19:00.004Z

Two Weddings, Six Spanish Cities, and a lot of Friends

What a lot of news ! I don't know where to begin...

A few days spent in the Spanish capital Madrid, seeing Javi and Andrea (preparing themselves for their wedding to come) as well as Lourdes (with whom we had the cheapest three rounds of drinks ever - it cost us negative 6 euros). The city was also visited, taking in the sights from the Turibus, having a coffee at the Juan Valdez, and having some great vegetarian food with Andrea and a menu del dia with Lourdes.

It was then off to Valencia by train. Here we stayed with Gemma, Victor, Alejandra and the newly born Claudia. The wedding of Fernando and Valeria was what everyone was waiting for here, and so we also met up with Nuria, Sylvia, Joan, Luca, Albakra and Sofia, Jose Marques and Angela, Paolo, Ali and Luigi, Juanfran, Bruno, Carmen, and many others that I'm sure to have forgotten to list here. Fun was had by all.

From here we went down to Cordoba, where arriving at 7pm with 34 degrees, we realised we weren't going to need any warm clothes. Great Mezquita, again great food, and then it was off the next day to Malaga. More specifically Torre del Mar. Here we met up with Marilo and Julio with their newborn Javi. Time was spent sunbathing on the beach and generally enjoying the seaside life in October.

Flying from Malaga to San Sebastian, we arrived just in time to miss the bus, so had to make our way by taxi to the city. The place is amazing. A proper sandy beach right next to the old town, with pintxos to be eaten non stop. Here we met up with Albakra and Sofia, Paolo, Jaume and Maria Jose, Albe, Luca, Jordi, el Putogues and Francesca, and Juanfran to go off to the wedding of Javi and Andrea. Here we ate until we were full, and then some more. The wedding was great, the meal was also enjoyed, and the party afterwards was just perfect for letting down your hair. Definitely a trip to remember !

From here it was then off to Bilbao before making our way to Santander to catch the plane back to Germany. Arriving to 6 degrees was a bit of a shock to us after temperatures of 30 degrees above that in Spain.

So many people, places and types of food (just think of those gambas in San Sebastian...) and all in all a very enjoyable trip. Now let's prepare the next one...

2009-09-26T07:32:00.002Z

Ammo Rationing, Nude German Rights and Intimate Millions

Rumours abound when people start fearing something is about to happen. Look at the US. People believing Obama is about to stop sales of weapons have been buying up every last bit of ammunition available to them. The factories have been working 24/7 to try to keep up with demand, and Walmart has been forced to ration the sale of bullets per customer. Yes, you read that right. I didn't know either that whilst buying my groceries I could also pick up a good few rounds of armour-piercing weaponry...

Those Germans. What have they done now? Well...seeing as they love nudity so much (although I must say the adverts on TV are definitely reducing the amount of flesh they show, thankfully), a campsite owner is creating the first nudist walking trail. Yes, put on your walking boots, thick winter socks, backpack, headgear and gloves, just leave your trousers at home...

So you are a truck driver travelling along a major road in Sweden, what would be more normal than pleasuring yourself at the wheel, right? Well, that's what this German truck driver did, whilst also high on drugs, causing his truck to tip over and block the road for over 10 hours. When police interviewed him to find out what happened he began to pleasure himself again in front of them. As you can imagine, the police were not too pleased, and took him away to their station.
Just imagine the calls from people held up going to work, phoning their bosses: "Hi, I'm sorry, I'm not going to be coming in to work today, I'm in a 10 hour tailback because of some German w***ker".

Staying with Sweden - apparently the military are being heavily criticised, as their uniform bras are exploding in combat. Yes, due to all that hard work they pop open or burn up, causing a fire beneath the rest of their clothing. Both cases require the quick removal of their outer clothing. Apparently there are plenty of military men only too willing to help them in their hour of need.
You may think that this would deter women from entering the Swedish armed forces. Apparently not. This year there are over 2000 young women who have signed up to join. I would love to draw conclusions, but it's probably best I don't...

Ever wondered what your Sex degrees of seperation are? Well, according to Lloyds Pharmacy (no direct relation) the average guy or gal in the UK gets around with 2.8 million people (no, you're not missing out on something here, don't get worried yet). These are statistics of taking your partner's partners, their partners etc for 6 degrees. Of course, the reason behind publishing these statistics are not too well hidden. You can buy a testing kit from said pharmacy for a princely sum of 75 pounds...

Private data is just much too handle nowadays. I mean, who wants the responsability to keep hold of thousand or even millions of people's personal information? Well Demon ISP obviously don't, as they sent out a file with all the data of 3600 customers in it, to those customers. So if you wanted to find out the username and password of New Scotland Yard, for instance, you just had to scroll. Maybe someday somebody will get reprimanded big time for such lapses of security...

So, another month drawing to an end, and this time a bit of a break for you. Yes, this blogger sometimes needs a rest too ;)

We'll meet again...

2009-09-20T19:15:00.002Z

Japanese Gropers, Digital Inclusion, and Hospital Food Blog

First up, congratulations to Gema, who has just given birth to her second daughter Claudia. We can't wait to see her !

Of course, we can't forget Gigi's birthday either, albeit celebrated a bit late in an indian restaurant with a circling fly.

If you're out and about in Japan on the train system and female, then maybe it's worth checking out some websites to find out which lines not to go on, after a man arrested for groping a student told police that he chose that line because it got top marks for gropeability on a website he visited. And you thought there are some things not done yet on the internet...

Everything's possible in Second Life. Which is why it is also currently being sued for allowing counterfeit goods to be produced and sold. But these aren't just any normal goods, rather a specific type of sex toy that the creators claim have been copied by others, and the owners of the Application haven't done enough to stop it. I wonder if the laywers have to file their case from within the program...

The Office for Digital Inclusion (making all people have a computer, whether they like it or not) have managed to really spread the word, as their offices were broken into and all the PCs stolen. Sounds like that their marketing program did it's job then...

When you are laid up in hospital (yes, this includes Carlitos still) with pain, lack of sleep, strangers all around you, and very few friendly visits, you would hope that at least the food would cheer you up. Well, take a look at this blog, written from a hospital bed, detailing in pictures what gets served up at his bedside every day. I'm thinking of collecting all my tinned vegetables together and sending them across to him...

And for those students out there, if you are interested in getting hold of a copy of Microsoft's new operating system, then head along to this page, where you will be able to get Windows 7 for a measly 30 dollars or pounds...

Be thankful for your food...

2009-09-14T11:27:00.002Z

Carnivals, Hi-Tech Wheelchairs, and Unhealthy Bed-Sharing

So, another August goes by, and another month of carnivals also survived. After the South American carnival from earlier on in the month, came the Notting Hill Carnival, which celebrates all things caribbean. Weather seemed to hold up, and many got to enjoy what is Europe's biggest street party.

Ever wondered why the wheelchair seems to look the same still as it did in the 1960s? Well, maybe you just haven't seen the latest technology coming out of Japan. Roll up their new product which includes such treats as integrated GPS and mounting from behind.

According to recent research, couples should consider sleeping apart in order to be able to relax whilst in bed. Suggestions like "doing it like the romans" spring to mind, but so do the early 19th century homesteads apparently, where there was enough space in the houses before the industrial revolution came about, to have seperate bedrooms.

According to a recent survey, some people actually believe that kebabs, fizzy drinks and crisps are actually oral contraceptives. Admittedly, if you've just eaten the aforementioned articles, it is definitely going to put any potential partner off, maybe that's what they were meaning...

A Swedish father has decided that he would like to be able to give children milk even when the mother is not there. So instead of just getting a pre-prepared bottle, he decides to massage his chest until after about 2 years he might have managed to produce about one drop of milk. I don't know if there exists a translation in Swedish for efficiency...

Ever wondered what the US government knows about you? Well, have a look at this article which contains the results of a Freedom of Information request, and contains gems such as full credit card numbers, expiry date, even of ones you didn't use for any booking in the US. Feel safe now? In fact, I wonder whether you are covered if these numbers get used fraudulantly? Do you have to prove that your number was on some government database in order to get any of the money back?...

Keep safe...

2009-08-30T10:58:00.002Z

Pornflakes, Stolen Member and Mayoral Miscreants

This Friday saw the visit of Roberto the Italian (as opposed to Roberto the Frenchman). As can be imagined, a visit to the Eisgrub was due, along with Ali, Luigi, Carlitos and Olgui, a few tubes were taken care of...

So you open up a nice new packet of cereal, want to pour on your milk and put the freebie DVD in the computer and watch that keep-fit episode. Imagine how shocked you would be if not only were there aerobics to see, but also plenty of smut. That's what happened to one Swedish woman who said that although she was shocked, she didn't get put off the cereal. In fact she went down the shops to get another packet (to watch the next episode in the series?). So make sure you open the new packets of cereal before your kids get an eyeful of something they shouldn't...

When the Lego version of a giraffe in the Berlin Zoo had its tail stolen again, there were a number of articles about it. None, however, happened to change the story as they UK version of Yahoo! News. They got a bit stuck on where the bit of anatomy came from and wrote:

Visitors to a tourist attraction in Berlin have been making off with an unusual memento - the 30 cm long penis of a Lego giraffe.

Notice the careful use of double-entendres as well in that phrase...

Mayors can get found out for fraud, misuse of property, inappropriate expenses claims and taking bribes. But not many stand accused of breaking into women's houses in his district and stealing their underwear. Well, ok, he is no longer a mayor (he resigned after being arrested), but the ex-mayor of a Lancashire town called Preesall is accused of just that. It is not mentioned whether he intended to give them back at all...

Keep an eye on your underwear...

2009-08-15T17:59:00.002Z

Scary Fungi, Scary Politicians, and Lots of Cheese

Ever thought that you should get a certificate for things you do every day? Well, a child from Bury was surprised to learn that he earned a certificate for getting on a bus. Before you laugh this one off, check the end of the article, where it mentions that this brother failed the test...

Twitter is the new texting, the new RSS, the new Facebook. Well, it's also the new botnet gateway, being used to tell computers where to download their latest payloads from. You have to give it to them, it's definitely a novel way of doing it. Let's just hope that it's just as easy to block them, otherwise Twitter will become known as the new malware...

Now for something not so nice. Sorry if you're currently eating...
A fungus has been discovered, that when eating away at living flesh, also controls the nerves and muscles of it's prey and turns them into zombies to go off to where the fungus can spread itself easier. Read the article, and then decide if you really want to do that jungle trip now...

On a similar note, a CDU politician in a district of Berlin decided there was no other option but to do something risque to try and win the local election. The problem is, she used a photo of Angela Merkel and herself, both in low cut tops, with the slogan "we have more to offer". Had they have been of some of Italy's politicians, then maybe it would work, but this...

The size wars have gone a step further now, with Tesco bringing into stock condoms of size XL after a growth in demand. Before you break out the champagne and laugh at the Europeans stuck with just L, take a look at the US where they already have XXL. Show offs...

Feeling a little down in the economy stakes? Got a bit of cheese lying around? Well why not use it as collateral for a loan with your bank. That's what the Italians do. In fact one of the banks which has been doing this since the 1950s has now got over 400 thousand parmesan rounds.

Now you thought that it was enough that Chavez decided to make the Venezualan time zone 30 mins different to what it has been, but spare a thought for the poor Algerians. Their weekend has been changed (again) and will now be Fridays and Saturdays...

Next time you are China don't be surprised if you get offered a piece of Stilton Cheese. Apparently, for the nouvelle riche, it's the status symbol, and western foods are used to impress business colleagues and partners alike. Finally an export market for SPAM...

And in case you are planning on eating rocket salad here in Germany, beware! It doesn't seem to have made it to the English-speaking press except for this one webpage from the Netzeit. Poisonous plants were found in packages of rocket salad in a Plus supermarket here in Germany, which cause damage to the liver. Check here for the information in English, and here for the original article from Der Spiegel in German. Best to keep with the iceberg lettuce then for now...But it always amazes me that this sort of occurrence (like the 5 year old meat that was sold as fresh) doesn't make it outside of Germany...Propaganda still seems to be working then...

And this weekend started off with a visit from Gloria, her sister with husband and child in tow. It was Gloria's first return to Mainz since our Erasmus year in 2000/1 so of course the visit had to include the (now finished) Theatre, Main Station, and of course lunch at the Eisgrub with a meter of beer. Great to see her again, and I think she enjoyed seeing Mainz again. Here's to the next time...

And tomorrow will be Roberto's turn to pay us a visit. Also a long time no see, but of the month variety, not years. Still, always good to catch up on all the gossip...

Don't eat green...

2009-08-09T11:06:00.002Z

Banking Brothels, Saving Water and Wedding Trains

The economy is in a crisis, you can't see a light at the end of the tunnel, so what do you do? Well ,maybe take a few leaves out of the Japanese banker's book. They have seen that the demand for brothels increase whilst other expenditures, like eating out, have decreased. So, now we know where all those finance people go after being laid off...

It's not just the economy that's in a crisis, so is the health of planet earth. Trying to help out, a Brazilian environmental group have released a video that's making it's rounds on YouTube, encouraging you to take a leak in the shower rather than flushing the toilet. Apparently it saves 12 litres of water per flush...

So what can a groom-to-be do to make his love stand out? How about, get his family and friends together to make the longest wedding train for his bride-to-be, reaching an astonishing 2162m long. The even sowed petals all over it. Apparently, though, the groom's mother didn't think much of the expenditure, and said it was a waste of money. At least the mother-in-law was probably positive about it...

Well, a humid week has been and gone, the thunderclouds are predicted for tonight, so hopefully it will cool off a bit for next week. Beatriz had her birthday picnic out by the river, enjoying the sun whilst one can, and Ester, Salvo etc came back from their Croatia trip full of enthusiasm.

Have a great shower...

2009-08-02T18:01:00.002Z

Expensive Scotch and Housewarming

Ever wanted to taste a really good scotch? Got too much money that just needs to be spent? Well head on down to the Glenfiddich distillary and buy yourself a bottle of 50 year old single malt for the handsome sum of 10 thousand pounds. If you can't quite make that, how about a shot for 357 pounds?

So we went off to Diana and Jan's place for a housewarming party. In the headlands of Hechtsheim, their top floor flat looked out over the rooftops of the surrounding houses, as smoke came out of the BBQ, and the marshmallows were going soft, we all tucked into the home made salads to accompany the meat. Fun was had by all.

Well, a bit short today, but lots to do...

2009-07-25T14:18:00.002Z

Real Balti, Dry Beer, and BBQ Bust-Up

Most of you should know by now that the best thing to come out of Birmingham is the balti. Okay, that's harsh. The best foodstuff to come out of brum is the balti. How's that? Well, in order to protect it's reputation and stop other people coming along and trying to pretend to serve up a real balti, Birmingham County Council is considering taking it up with the European Union to protect it's assets. Yep, prepare to see it alongside such protected names as Champagne, Wensleydale, and Yorkshire Pudding. Now where's my balti dish...

It shouldn't happen. It just shouldn't happen. But the Beer on the Wye fetival had to be called off early as they ran out of beer. Yes, you read it correctly, the visitors appeared to be so thirsty that despite picking up another 18 barrels on the saturday, they still couldn't keep up with demand. I don't know whether to praise the participants for setting a good example, or to condone the organisers for not being well enough prepared...

Ever wondered what sort of discounts you get for being a cyclist? Well head over to Berlin where the current offer is for a 5 Euro discount off an intimate affair (or as TheRegister accurately puts it "a pop"). Just don't forget to take off your reflective trouser clips...

Fancy having a barbie for your birthday? A nice small group of 15 friends burning their sausages and talking about the old days...just be careful you don't mention it on any social network site. After announcing one on facebook as being an all-nighter (open-end til the food or beer runs out), one man was surprised to see a handful of police cars, a riot van, as well as a police helicopter arriving to shut them down. They didn't even get the music plugged in. Maybe that's why so many people turned up to the Beer on the Wye festival...a lot safer...

Want to know where to get your next joint? Got an iPhone? Well look no further than this new application that let's you know where your nearest dispenser is, and has a list of local lawyers too in case you get busted by the cops. Takes all the fun out of asking dodgy people on corners...

Next time you go to a charity shop, take a good look before you pick something up, after a Claymore mine was dropped off at one shop in Colorado. Luckily nobody thought about packing it in a box with other items on top...

Ever on your bike and realise you're mobile needs charging, but don't have the time to do it at home before you need to go out again? Well why not use your own pedal power to charge it whilst you're on the move? Two students in Kenya have produced these pedal chargers and hope to be making some more soon once they've finished their studies. Next up you'll need to charge the bike GPS as well...

Keep safe on the streets...

2009-06-28T15:49:00.002Z

The Real iPods, Chili Bombs, and Behind Crop Circles

If you're like me, you got fed up about 6 monhts ago about everything iPoddy. Well here's a piece of news that might cheer you up. The London Eye (yes, the big ferris wheel along the Thames) has started an upgrade to it's capsules, by floating the first one down the river. These capsules are otherwise known as pods, and they come from the London Eye...ok, never mind, moving swiftly on...

Think that the local curry house's vindaloo is a bit too hot for you? Well spare a thought for anyone on the receiving end of one of the Indian army's latest crowd control deterrents. It's a chili bomb. A grenade is filled with special chili powder that is about 1000 times hotter than normal chili. You'll need a gallon of lager to wash that down though...

Aliens or alien-wannabes are normally seen as the culprits of crop circles that appear all over the world in various forms. Well in Australia the secret is no more. Wallabies were found to have been eating poppy seeds and getting high on the opium within, that when they went around hopping, they couldn't do it straight, and went around in circles. Definitely sound more amusing to watch...

Ever wanted to see a volcano explode from above, but a bit weary about flying overhead? Look to the ISS for this great picture they took whilst passing by this eruption in the Far East. Amazing view...

And you thought that your church was a good sanctuary...not any more. One US pastor has held a service with the congregation bringing in their own weapons, saying that it should be celebrated that one can 'bear arms'...Thinking about this some more, maybe three was a misunderstanding when the original amendment was done to the US constitution. Maybe every American has the right to the arms of the bears. Also not particularly eco-friendly, but maybe a little less dangerous...

Before you go swimming in the local river, maybe it's worth taking note of what type of fish you might find. In the river Wear a rare blood-sucking fish was found (note the many teeth) recently. It's a thing of nightmares and horror films...I'll be going to the local swimming baths from now on...

Late breaking news is that the leader of Honduras has just been ousted by the military. Let's hope the situation sorts itself out peacefully in a short time...

Keep those toes out of the water...

2009-06-21T17:45:00.002Z

Spanish Insults, Vegetable Revolution and Sticky Wallpaper

No sooner is one batch of news over and done with, than a few more stories catch my eye. So, part two of this week's news:

Want to let out your frustration and aggression from work before you get back home to the family? Well one barkeeper in Spain has decided that he will endure this for the good of mankind. The fact he thinks we need an invitation to do this is surprising indeed coming from a country that uses such obscenities in everyday language without raising an eyebrow...

Che would be turning in his grave. All that revolutionary spirit and strict beliefs...and what does his daughter go and do? Pose naked only dressed up in bio carrots and his famous beret for PETA...

Just got onto the netbook bandwagon, and decided that Windows 7 will be the best operating system for it? Just make sure you like Microsoft's colours, as they are not letting you change lots of settings like the background wallpaper...

Keep those colours free...

2009-06-21T11:00:00.002Z

Crumbling Recession, Flying McDonalds and Sicily Vanishes

As the financial crisis takes its toll, people start to cut back on their luxury items. No longer wanting a second car, nor jetting off to those far off places. One thing apparently doesn't change in these circumstances - our appetite for food. We seem to go through our normal routines without turning to financial diets. Let's just hope the economy can survive on this in the long term...

Two Royal Naval officers have appeared in a Chilean court for apparently stealing a life size Ronald McDonald statue, and throwing it into the harbour. I bet they wouldn't have had any trouble if they had just thrown their burgers in there...

Alitalia has been a bit red-faced recently after it printed maps in its inflight magazines missing off the island of Sicily. When someone checks in a horse's head, you will know why...

If you didn't already know, the summer solstice has just begun. You would have noticed if you were passing anywhere near Stonehenge, where over 36 thousand people attended the rising of the sun on this day. And you thought you had to be a musical star to attract that many fans...

Google's StreetView has had quite a bit of bad press, due to the privacy implications of everything being filmed when it's cars drive by. Well this time it gets some good press out of it. In the Netherlands StreetView was used by a victim of a mugging to identify his assailants. Now if you could only track them back to their homes...

If the weather is still being good to you, you might want to head down to Brighton to celebrate the arrival of the thousands of cyclists that are making their way down from London in order to raise money for the British Heart Foundation. Of course, if you're in a car, you might want to avoid this route...

Dr Who fans everywhere should head down to Huddersfield to see the reappearance of a Tardis. And not for the television series, but actually being reintroduced for the local police force. Are we heading back to the good old days of old fashioned policing? Let's hope so...

Well, Karla's birthday party has been and gone, everyone enjoyed it, and now we have to get ready for a new week...

Keep out of the way of those Johannisfest revellers...

2009-06-16T20:01:00.002Z

GPS Capers, Special Nurses, and Free Willy

So, we've heard about the people that follow their GPS blindly, even if it sends them from Birmingham to Liverpool via Calais, but how about the guys that bulldozed a house from it's GPS coordinated rather than an address? It was the first the owner heard about it too...

Ever wondered how life could get any worse than just being put in jail? How about if the nurse gives you an overdosis that makes you "stand up" for the next 3 days? You can imagine how that goes down in the communal showers...

And back to reality where Carlitos has been trying to survive on the hospital food here in Mainz whilst they operate on his leg. Here's hoping they let him out tomorrow and he gets back to normal soon. Okay, normal for him...

Don't walk under any ladders...

2009-06-01T14:49:00.003Z

Chasing the Cheese, Losing your Fingerprints, and Okay to Snog?

Fancy running after a cheese? How about rolling down a hill after it? That's what happened again this May bank holiday when the 7lb Double Gloucester was rolled down Cooper's Hill. Be warned however if you plan to join in next year - 58 people needed medical attention this year...

The Chinese theme park based upon sex, with naked bodies, large genitalia and the history of sex, has not been allowed to open. No, the government managed to step in and say that "Love Land" was just sensationalist and had no moral values. So, let's see if those flight tickets can be canceled...

An often used cancer drug has been found to remove patient's fingerprints. As it causes blisters and peeling of the skin, after using it for some time, the fingerprints become so faint that they can no longer be detected for ID purposes, for instance at the US border control. I can see spiderman coming back with this knowledge...

Ever wanted to know if your breath is minty fresh enough for chatting up that lovely lady in the pub? Well, first off, don't bother worrying, if you've had a few pints, it'll be the lager they can smell whether you've done your teeth or not. But seriously, an israeli inventor has come up with a "breathalizer" which you can use to check if you're going to put someone off before you get close to them. Of course, it's not mentioned about people from different cultures having different versions of their preferred smells...

So, another national holiday has gone by, weather wasn't good enough for a BBQ though. Have to leave that til august. Must say that "Educating Rita" at the English Theatre in Frankfurt was worth seeing, whatever the weather.

Keep it fresh...

2009-05-16T13:58:00.002Z

Birthdays, German Busts and Shorter Meetings

First up, birthdays have been on left, right and centre. Ester, Vanessa and Caro L have all been out celebrating an extra candle on their cakes. Happy birthday to you all!

Anyone wondering about the German preference for large breasted women can now go back to the origins, after a 35,000 year-old statue was found of the earliest 3D pornography. As one can see, here too were the proportions more on a fantasy scale rather than something realistic. Unless they are realistic, then I think there will be many people wishing they could go back in time to check it out for themselves...

Ever thought that the meeting you need to go to shouldn't take up a whole hour that it is set for? Maybe you wanted a quick decision on something without the filling in a whole block of your diary. Well, IBM has come up with a solution for you. You will be able to schedule shorter meetings than the one-hour unit. Yes, they will sell you software that will allow you to have a meeting of 50 mins if you like. Think you can do this yourself without their help? Well, watch out, they have just filed a patent on shorter-than-one-hour meetings...

You will probably already know of Google StreetView, where cars of the search giant go around cities filming everything they see, which is then made available for all to see on Google Maps. Personally I find it a great help being able to see what an area looks like before visiting it. Of course, there is the privacy to consider. After catching people in all sorts of positions, they were forced to integrate a face-blurring algorithm. This has been seen as a great way of protecting people's identities without losing the great quality images. Well, it seems that this algorithm is so good, it's also started protecting children from the fast-food industry. Yes, Colonel Sanders face has been blurred, looking eerily like one of those crimewatch videos...

The (polish) catholic church is fighting back and showing people it's up to date with modern wishes. Yes, a priest has decided to get people away from that far eastern Karma Sutra, and onto his own book called "Sex as you don't know it". It's already on a second reprint after selling out of its initial 5000 copies within a week...

Well tonight it's the Eurovision Song Contest. Get your vote in...

2009-04-29T06:24:00.002Z

Birthday Wishes, Hedgehog Diet, Hidden Irish

So first up it was Olgui's birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday !!! This year's event took place in Havanna (the restaurant) with a fair number of tables being filled by guests. Highlights of the night were the rollos (of which were eaten about 15) and the birthday cake (with chocolate sticks for candles).

Now some people go on diets, then their cats and dogs go on diets, but this is the first time I've heard about a hedgehog having to go on a diet. It apparently weighs over 2 kilos...

Lined up for brain surgery? Maybe it's worth insisting that no Father Ted is shown on the hospital television beforehand. A Yorkshire man woke up from his with a full Irish accent, despite having never been to the country, nor having an relatives from there...

Next time you hear noises late at night have a thought for this lady that now has to appear before court for having breached her ASBO for noisy sex again. There apparently is no proof of the noise except for the neighbours not being able to sleep...

An interesting twist has come to the tale of Israeli oranges that appeared in Iran. Apparently they were faked brand oranges from China...

Finally wanted to get some use from Google Street View? Well how about for checking out the local ladies of the night...

Wrap up well...

2009-04-26T10:55:00.002Z

Protective Underwear, Long-distance Loving and despicable parenting

Get nervous when youths enter a shop you are in? Feel intimidated when people start shouting at each other around you? Want to wear a bullet-proof vest but worry you can't disguise it? Well fear no more, all you need is a suitably wired bra, as a woman in Detroit found out. When four robbers trying to escape saw that a woman had been watching them, they fired off a shot at her. This bullet hit the underwiring of her bra and was deflected, not even piercing her skin. Now all we need to do is find something similar men can wear...

Technology can solve everything someone once said. Well, for the people that are a long distance apart yet need the intimacy between them to carry on, scientists have invented such a device that projects the position of one body through light on your own body and allows as such a virtual interaction. However, it's uses are not restricted here, they are also testing a similar device for virtual fighting...

The province of Alberta in Canada might not be well know all over the world, but a brief knowledge of geography and one can normally know that it's a land-locked (shouldn't this be logged?) state. So it was a bit of a surprise when their latest tourist video showed pictures of a family on a beach. Further investigation showed that the picture of the beach was actually from Northumberland in the UK. Well, I suppose the advert helped someone's tourism...

Feeling the pinch of the financial crisis? No longer able to do all things you used to? Feel insecure about how your family is going to survive? So what would you do? Well, hopefully not set off for Italy and then leave your three young children in a pizzeria and go into hiding like this faimly in Germany just did. It beggars belief what some people have for brains...

So a BBQ along the Rhine coming up if the weather holds, great way of sing up those sausages...

2009-04-21T07:06:00.002Z

Tube Reading, Sexless Ants and Brazilian Lingerie

Whilst the weather can't make up it's mind, why not take the tube to some of London's favourite tourist attractions. Whilst you're about it, pick up a good read. Once a month novels are given outside certain tube stations and can be dropped off once they are read. Makes a change from all those free papers that end up stuck to the bottom of your foot, or lanced at you whilst you walk down Oxford Street...

Remember those science fiction films you saw as a kid (or maybe also as a grown up?) where the villains use cloning to produce their perfect race of soldiers? Well, amazonian ants have started cloning themselves, so they no longer need to mate in order to reproduce. As it's known by all that ants will take over the world someday, surely this is the first wakeup call, that this day is coming soon?...

Considering taking the missus away on a dirty weekend? Well don't think about coming to the UK. A Brazilian woman has been refused entry to Newcastle airport (after also being denied to enter Belfast too after it was found that she had a lot of underwear in her suitcase, but little else. It just goes to show that one should travel without any clothes then...although I bet you'll be turned back for other reasons as well...

Looking for that unusual gift for someone special? Well the new rage in Australia is paper made from wombat poo. Yep, this isn't just any recycling, it's exporting the sewage that one would normally pump out into the sea or bury in land fills. Genius...

The so-called environmental bonus in Germany is under mounting criticism that it's creating scrapyards full of cars that would otherwise have been resold. Cars with less than 20k on the clock, 9 years old, sparkling condition are all being scrapped as the Germans get a bonus off purchase of their new car. Of course this means more people are buying smaller cars now (the bonus is therefore a higher discount) but also, as Germans are used to changing their cars every other year, it's created a surge in scraps which are perfectly ok to drive, and probably not even environmentally worse than the newer ones they buy. It reminds me of a time (1939?) when all metal objects were collected by the government in order for them to make products of their own...

Now for something completely different. You may have asked why are people on the telly always good looking? Why aren't there any not-so-good-looking people that have talent? Well, in Britain's Got Talent a lady named Susan Boyle appeared, astounding critics with her marvelous rendition of Les Miserables, despite coming on stage to jeers and laughs. You have to see this video of it. Very enlightening...

So get your karaoke out and start practicing...

2009-04-11T13:29:00.003Z

Meat, Sex and Pineapples

According to new research, eating the famous bacon sarnie after going on a bender does actually help to cure your hangover. It wouldn't surprise many of us, however, things like this we have known since the heady days of Selly Oak life. What we're still waiting for is the proof that having a curry at 4am after coming back from a club also helps one to lose weight...

It appears that chimps have finally figured out the meaning of life. The male chimps now know that if they share their portion of meat with the ladies, they get to mate more often than their greedy cousins. Of course there will be nervousness around the hut, with rumours of a "meat for sex" scandal to erupt soon...

So you've come to a foreign country to film a video, and you decide to have a break and go and grab a bite to eat. Who do you leave protecting your expensive camera kit? A security guard? Policeman? Some big bloke who needs the money? Well these japanese decided that leaving some poor guy dressed in a pineapple outfit would be enough. As you can imagine, the camera kit vanished quicker than you could say pineapple juice...

Always on the lookout for great job descriptions, the swedish have decided that they are missing out on claiming tax on people stripping on the web. So some poor guy has to go around visiting all the stripping webcam sites of the internet, checking to see if one of the strippers could be swedish, who he then tries to contact in order to get a name or address so that he can then send off a tax bill to her. Must be a difficult job to find people for...maybe the community could do it for him...

Do your bit...

2009-04-04T16:04:00.002Z

Sunning it up

So, you've finished looking at the pictures of the Mainz Carnival 2009, and wanting to know what to do? Well, you should have gone down to Colombia in March. Great weather (sun, 35 degrees celsius in Barranquilla), great food (perrito italo-hawaiano, chuzo de pollo desgranado con mazorca, sancocho, arequipe, fritanga...), great music (Santana in concert) so I hope you can understand why I didn't update this blog for a while :)

Anyways, the world has moved on over the last month. The sun has actually come to work part-time in Mainz. Yes, the last couple of days we've had sunny spells, and temperatures rising to 18 degrees! Time to put the winter clothes away and get those shorts back out...

If you're planning on going down to the Black Forest, double check which hotel you've booked into, as one in particular has decided to go naturist. Clothes are completely forbidden. Just make sure you don't order a hot dog...

How to annoy everyone at a political summit? Hold up the starting speech by talking on your phone. That's what Berlusconi decided to do at the NATO summit. I wonder whether the Italians pay his roaming charges...

Get those grills cleaned up, if this keeps up we'll be having a barbie next week :)

2009-03-01T16:35:00.001Z

A little bit of the Carnival in Mainz 2009

2009-02-21T13:45:00.002Z

Polish Drivers, Best Sarnies, and Chavez Dictates

The Carnival is underway here in Mainz, which means that you meet even stranger people on the street than normal, any style goes, and that there's always enough broken glass on the floor to cut your shoes open. Well, I suppose that's what the alcohol is for - it stops you worrying about these sort of problems. Today the children get to process in the pouring rain. Maybe it'll dry up by Monday when there are meant to be half a million extra people in the city...

If you were reading the driving license of a foreign national what would you think would be the most important piece of information on it? Maybe the name of the driver? Well not if you're in Ireland. On the police computer systems there are aver 50 people with the equivalent name of Mr Driving License. Good to know that the streets are safe...

Feeling peckish? Well why don't you pop down to Bob's Big Bite in Stourbridge and get your hands on a great bacon sandwich (as rated by the AA guide). Definitely one not to miss...

Want to get one over on a mate? Ten try copying this prank which sent a Manchurian up to Glasgow to see his new internet love, only to find she didn't exist. It brings a new level to team rivalry.

Hugo Chavez has pulled it off and is now able to be elected president of Venezuela as many times as he likes. The favourable vote nothing to do with the fact that the law also applies to all state positions...

So get your fancy costume on (yes, I mean you, Carlitos) and get down to the parade...

2009-02-15T15:03:00.003Z

Chips and Ironing Boards, Missing Apostrophes, German Spies

As the snow and rain do their worst, there are some things in life that brighten up your day. Watching Wales play against England in the Rugby Six Nations yesterday is one of them (want to know the rules, watch this). Great game, helped along with the company of Carlitos and Luigi and a couple of beers. Hearing that I've become a godfather and uncle at the same time is another.

The Deutsche Bahn are having a bit of a problem now, as it turns out that they have been secretly spying on their employees, and their families. It gives most of the population a bitter taste harking back to the days of the third reich. Maybe the investigations were the reason why the trains always came late...

Ever wondered why a chippy always smells good when you pass by? Well according to new research, the mix of smells from butterscotch to ironing boards are the reason. Let's get those shirts out again then...

There is a current trend in the West Midlands of getting rid of that little harmless dot, the apostrophe. Yes, all street signs have started having theirs snowpaked out. Of course some people aren't happy about this, so they've started up a group of apostrophe protectors that protest against these inhumane persecutions.Next they'll be wanting to get rid of commas...

The Telegraph has done some investigation and found a reason why kids nowadays should be doing cocaine instead of having a pint of lager - it's cheaper (sorry, am I allowed that apostrophe?).
Maybe we should bring back the good old days of a pound a pint in order to get rid of the drug craze :)

Well, the Carnival time is getting nearer, weirdly dressed people are all over town, and it's not the usual lot of the lederhosen brigade. There will be cows, bulls, even certain cartoon robots (bender?) all out there mingling with the other strangely dressed objects. So button down the hatches and unplug the TV, there's no escaping it...

2009-02-07T18:06:00.002Z

Snow Chaos, Final Countdown and Back to Earth

In case you hadn't heard already, the UK is currently experiencing the worst snow conditions for over 20 years. This has led to schools being closed, all buses in London being taken out of service, huge delays and many cancellations at airports, and low levels of salt for gritting the roads. At least those that are inside can keep cosy with their mugs of ovaltine and a log fire...

The clock's ticking, not long left now. Are you ready for it? Yes, it's the Epoch countdown. In under a week the computer date system will reach 1234567890. Rumours of millenium-style problems occurring are completely unfounded...

After a while out exploring the universe(s), Red Dwarf is set to come back to Earth this Easter. Yes, the series will be coming back to our screens for a couple of episodes to top off their 11 year stint on the BBC. Set your video recorder...

On a similar note, if you have a problem, and you don't know who to call, then get down to the cinemas next year to see the film version of The A-Team. Whether BA will be able to board the plane to Hollywood has yet to be seen...

The new African Union chairman is going to make things interesting this year, as Col Gaddafi has started off by saying that in Africa, the best model is where there are no opposition parties, like in his own Libya. He also started up the discussion of the United States of Africa again...

In the meantime, here in Mainz it's been raining most of the time, which sort of dampens the spirits for going out to parties at the moment. Never mind, maybe Ali will cook up a great Sunday dinner for us :)

Eat well...

2009-01-17T15:34:00.006Z

Dream Job, Deadly Jams, Suicidal Goats and Polite Deaths

Ever wanted to know what your dream job was? I'm sure it involved a lot of money, for little work, in surroundings that you love, doing what you love.
Well then this job might be just up your alley.
Money: 70 thousand pounds. Contract: 6 months. Job Description: Caretaker of one of the islands of Australia's Whitsunday Islands. Includes feeding fish, collecting island's mail, sailing, diving, laying on beach. Not more than 12 hours a month. Now, where did I have my CV...

Next time you see a splodge of jam on the side of a plate, duck for cover. US scientists are investigating exploding marmalade for use in rockets. I think I'm having honey on my crumpets...

The animals of a Canadian zoo are coming to terms with the sad loss of one of their goats. This wasn't just any loss, but the goat apparently was found hanging from a noose within it's enclosure. The penguins are currently investigating the circumstances surrounding it.

A new theory is being suggested as to why so many Britons died on the Titanic when it sunk. The politeness of the British was apparently the reason why they made sure the others were out of harm's way before thinking about themselves. I think I would also want to check the percentage of British on board first, as a majority would also explain it quite reasonably.

Missing those great old steam locomotives? Then head down to Darlington where a the first steam engine to be built in nearly 50 years is currently running passengers around England. You can just taste that smoke going into your lungs...hold on, isn't it a no-smoking train?

Did you use to phone up people asking if they are really mr so-and-so, and sniggering when they confirm it? Well, feel for people like that who have rude names in their addresses. Some of them get refused deliveries and turn red when trying to explain to people that their address really does have those words in it. Makes those old prank phonecalls seem tame in comparison...

Now let's check out this address on the GPS...

2009-01-11T12:26:00.002Z

Pretty In Pink, The Truth Behind Smut

As the temperatures plummet, water pipes freeze, the roads become ice rinks, and everything is covered in a blanket of snow, sometimes one just wants to be a child again. Snowball fights, building snowmen, making yeti footprints and coming home frozen to the bone with snow coming out of your ears. Ah, the good old days...

Want an experience that Charles Darwin didn't get? Then head over to the Galapagos islands and check out the pink iguana. Yes, this fashion statement of a creature avoided Darwin's travels and has remained until recently a mystery. Looks to me like it forgot to put it's coat on...

What's green, slimy and flies? The new algae-burning Boeing 737 that's doing test runs around Texas. Using algae it doesn't create a shortage of foodstuffs in the third world. Whether the fish start complaining about their food reserves going down is yet to be seen.

If you're in the business of paying for pleasure (and I don't mean a game of monopoly) then you might want to read what the UK government are currently trying to pass through law without actually having thought it through properly. Of course this is not new, many laws are passed without even looking at the facts. If it's hyped enough, and a splattering of key words are used, then people will think they're stopping something bad, when in fact they could be affecting many things that are not bad at all. Read the article to get a lowdown on exactly what it entails. When will facts and statistics actually be used properly in politics?

Following on from the banks and auto industry, the sex industry in the US also wants a government bailout. They believe that with the current economic situation, fewer people will be enjoying the X-rated services offered by said companies. If you believe the US should pay to support it's pleasure palaces, then write to your congressman now...

Sticking to the US, ever wondered how the statistics look like on what topics Bush has been talking about and how the trends developed over time? Then have a look at this article, showing how terror, taxes, health, and jobs have fared over the last eight years.

Lots of weird things happen over the new year. Resolutions are made and broken, prices go up, it gets cold. Well, obviously someone had a bit of spare time on his hands and set about declaring his love from the rooftop of a carpet store. Whether he's trying to tell all the google earth viewers, or some local pilots is yet to be found out.

After 80 years, Winnie the Pooh is set to come back to the bookshelves with a new sequel approved by the estates of the original authors. Whether the honey still tastes as good, or piglet falls in love is of course a secret. You'll just have to read it yourselves...

Keep those heaters running...

2009-01-04T17:25:00.002Z

New Year's Resolutions

Yes, those things that everybody makes and after about 4 days breaks. The promises that make us feel better just because we have thought of something we're bad at. Well, it's that time of year again, and half of you will be starting new diets, 30% will be giving up smoking, 20% will try to be more forgiving, and 3 people will promise to be vegetarians. So what was your resolution? Answers on the back of a postcard please...

Well the pope has made a change for new year. He's stated that the Vatican will no longer accept the laws of Italy without first considering every single one in much detail. The obvious ones to be ignored will be giving equal rights to homosexuals, abortions, divorce...do they really want to go back to the Spanish inquisition times?

You're a shopkeeper and want the day off over Christmas, but don't want to close the store. What do you do? Well, in north yorkshire a shopowner let customers take the things they wanted and leave their money in a tin for him. Apparently it worked. Although, if the shop had been in any of the neighbouring towns maybe there wouldn't be much left of it (as some of the interviewees in this article mention). I suppose it solves the problem of opening hours, although checking for ID on alcohol might be difficult...

Ever wanted to know what the locals are like? Moving into a new area, visiting on holiday? Wouldn't it be great if you could see if it's a dodgy area, or lots of roadworks, litter etc? Well welcome Google's Streetview, allowing you to see for instance, that in Madrid ladies are forced to urinate in the street. Whether it was an order from the Vatican has yet to be confirmed...

And as we prepare to go back to work after our festivities, what better than to look back at whom we spent them with. This year I must say that New Year in the north of England wouldn't normally be on the top of my list, but getting to do some great excursions, and of course to see my nephew, his parents, and my parents were of course the highlight. Christmas in Wiesbaden was also surprisingly enjoyable. No sauerkraut, no black bread, no lack of humour, just great food, drink, presents, and of course company. So thanks to all of you who made my festive season just that.

Now the weathermen are saying that next week will get down to minus 20 degrees. I really hope they got their decimal point wrong...otherwise we'll be scraping ice of the inside of our windows...

2008-12-27T16:30:00.002Z

Post-Christmas Round-Up

The turkey has been eaten, the wine bottles are all empty, now we're at that time of the year where nobody really knows what to do. Of course, this has not stopped marketing types coming up with the idea of bringing forward the January sales so that they actually start from Boxing Day. So if you're not out getting next year's Christmas presents right now (best time of the year) then sit back, relax and read through my selected news stories.

So you got an iPhone for Xmas. yippee. Bored already? Want to actually make it do something useful? Well try the iBoobs application. It had to come at some point. Watch the video and see what tilt mechanisms are really meant for.

Maybe you got that same old boring doll again. Never mind, you can give that away to a friend whilst you play with the next generation. Yes, these dolls let you feed them, and when it's time, the processed food comes out down below. Take too long, and you'll be buying the extra packs of nappies...Just what very girl wanted !

Scientists fed up with telling us the problems that drugs have on our brains have come up with a job on the side. Yes, they're now playing with bees, getting them hooked on cocaine, selling their bodies to scientist pimps and throwing up outside the local pubs. Ok, the last two things are maybe an exaggeration, but the addiction of bees is being studied in great detail.

How did technology help little kids this Christmas? This year they got to track Santa's journey around the world using online maps and webcams. The pictures of him taking a short cut were apparently just fakes...

And what better way in getting peace to spread in the middle east, than to give the warlords a big pile of Viagra tablets. Yes, as they'll keep on saying - Make love, not war...

So if you managed to survive the cholesterol mountain, and you need something to do, then you just have to call the A(fter Xmas sales) Team...

Wrap up those credit cards well...

2008-12-21T13:02:00.003Z

Perfume with Fries, Singing Underwear, and Swiss Opening

You've heard of the J-Lo scent, but did you know that a new perfume in wowing the crowds on the streets of New York this Christmas? This one you'll never guess. It's from Burger King. Yes, not only are people being asked if they want fries with their meal, but whether they want to smell like that even when they have left the establishment. Next up will be the Fishmonger's, Cheese-maker's and maybe the Manure-spreader's varieties...

Looking for a present for some woman that has everything? Well how about some Syrian underwear that falls down when you clap your hands? Or ones that have fairy lights on them and play ringtones? Until recently little known outside of Syria, these pieces of clothing are now coming to light and are arousing interest (pardon the pun) outside of the country.

Switzerland, the neutral country there in the middle of Europe has opened up its borders to other European countries. Yes, in November of 2008 it joined the Schengen Agreement allowing free movement for people from other member states. The population are now waiting to see whether or not a negative impact of this change will come. At least border controls should be quicker...

And finally in the terrible episode of the decline of Zimbabwe, Mugabe has decided that the cholera epidemic that is currently killing many inhabitants is an attack from Great Britain. Yes, in a country where the inflation rate has gone off the scale, poverty is nationwide, and political opponents commonly disappear, one can only hope that he gets removed from his position as soon as possible, and allows all the innocent people of Zimbabwe to try and rescue their lives.

So, Christmas is coming, it's already cold, so get your mug of mulled wine, put on the Christmas pud, and snuggle up to the fire.

Just remember, a blog's not just for Christmas...

2008-12-13T17:48:00.002Z

Every Second Counts, Remakes, Dangerous Kisses

Sometimes you just have to take advantage of what time you have. This year, thanks to certain scientists, you get an extra second to use as you wish. No strings attached. So when you are listening to the bells toll at midnight on New Year's Eve, then think about that final second - you get to celebrate it twice ! Use it wisely...

After having seen the Americans rehash, sorry remake, The Italian Job, it comes as no surprise that others are following suit too. I don't know why people can't just leave originals as they are, and keep the memories fond. This time it's Bollywood that's making it, and will include lots of song and dance. I doubt there will even be a bank heist...

Next time you pucker up, be very careful. A Chinese woman was left deaf after her boyfriend gave her a bit too strong of a kiss. The media warned soon afterwards of the dangers of excessive kissing, and doctors advised people to proceed with caution...

You here of cities trying to build taller buildings to break records, but this time a Chinese city has decided it wants to know down it's tallest ones in order to be considered as a Unesco site. All very well you might think, but the owners of said buildings hadn't heard anything about it until this report...

The new Airbus A380 is now getting complaints from it's pilots - that it's too quiet. Apparently they like the rumble of the engines to fall asleep and drown out the noise of the passengers nearby...

Amsterdam is cutting down the number of red light district windows, and "coffee shops". Apparently they want to get rid of organised crime, but keeping their most famous attractions.

The Japanese like their toilets. They have dynamic flush options, are able to measure your body-fat ratio, can be heated, and have a wash function like that of a bidet. Makes those public toilets outside the Rewe supermarket at Mainz HBf really look like holes in the ground.

The Max Planck Institute is somewhat of a serious name here in Germany. They do great scientific research, are well recognised and are one of the best known German brands. So how do they feel, now that they mistakenly put up an advertisement for hot young housewives in Chinese on the front cover of the research magazine? You would have thought, they would have found someone to check it thoroughly before it went to press...

Well, Lobelto had his birthday a while back, but hasn't been here in Mainz yet to celebrate. Apparently he's arriving today - but we'll believe that when we see it. Apart from that the snow's been falling on occasional days, but not as much down south around Stuttgart earlier in the week. It's still cold enough to freeze the balls of a brass monkey.

Wrap up well, and get one of them gluehweins down ya...

2008-11-29T16:44:00.002Z

Facebook Guilt, Polar Mix-Up, and Dietry Accident

Let's start today with a poll. Hands up those of you who think they could be a good juror? And how many of you think that you would act accordingly to make your decision? Of those, how many of you would want to phone a friend? And how many would want to open it up to the public and get them to decide for you? Well, that's what happened in Burnley Crown Court when a juror posted the details of the sex-abuse case on her facebook account and then asked people to decide it for her. Nice to know we are in safe hands...

So you've got a polar bear and want it to breed. When looking for a mate, what would you normally put on your checklist? In good health? Right age? Easy to maintain?
Well in northern Japan, the zookeeper overlooked one important question: is the mate of the opposite sex? Yes, after keeping them together and seeing no intimate action, further investigation entailed where they found out that in fact their bear was female as was the one just bought. No wonder so many animals become extinct...

Part of the M42 motorway was closed the other day after a six car pile-up led to beer and marshmallows being spilt over the road. I'm sure the clean up people will have fun with that...

In order to preserve the British engineering work that went into building the bridges across the river thames, seven of them have now been given listed status. If that included the London bridge that the americans bought off us has yet to be confirmed.

Love scones? Bored of the same old flavours? Well then, you're in luck! A northumberland cafe owner has been producing scones of such variety, that she's now trying for the guinness record. Flavours include Newcastle Brown Ale, Chili, and almost anything else you can imagine. Get your boots on and pick up your next batch now.

So the Christmas markets have now opened across Germany, mulled wine is being consumed, as are the usual sausages in a bun, roast pork, roasted almonds etc.

Keep that woolly hat on...

2008-11-23T11:23:00.002Z

Wonky Veg, Perfect Puds and Paper Spoof

Whilst the weather takes a turn towards winter, the snow starts falling, and the Christmas biscuits and stollen are now on sale (ok, they have been since October), one needs to relax with a glass of wine by an open fire and enjoy it. Either that or you freeze at home thinking about all that work to do and all those people in the way doing their festive shopping...

The European Union is reversing a law that they introduced banning the sale of 26 types of fruit and vegetables if they did not come up to standards. These standards included that a carrot cannot be wobbly, a cucumber must be straight and many other completely bizarre cases. This meant that these items of food were only allowed to be used for processing, or more likely, thrown away. Hopefully now we will not be wasting so much food for such a stupid rule, and then complaining there isn't enough food in the world...

The Royal Society of Chemistry has proven their worth once more as they have now decided on the exact definition of a true Yorkshire Pudding. So none of that pre-cooked meal stuff, or soggy mini puds on the side of your plate. This is the real thing...

A spoofed edition of the New York Times was printed out a million times and distributed on the streets to unwitting passers by. It included stories about the Iraq War ending, the US getting free healthcare, and other hopeful events. It was also dated in the future, in case people hadn't realised by now that it wasn't actually the paper they expected.

Don't believe everything you read...

2008-11-09T11:53:00.003Z

Foot Massages, Ovine Lolitas, and Star Wars Toast

Last weekend Celine came to visit. Thankfully not THE Celine. Just in time for a mini celebration. So off we went to the English Theatre in Frankfurt to watch Gas Lights. Very good play set in victorian England. Before that we had to fill our stomaches with something tasty, so one Kangaroo Burger later and there we were finding our seats in the theatre.

Of course there was another reason for the mini celebration. A certain someone reached a new decade in his life. But let's not go into that :)
Coming back to Mainz reasonably late, we found Carlitos and Luigi already at the Eisgrub awaiting our arrival. A few beers later and we were all merry.

Now onto some news.

Do you have tired feet? Need a relaxing massage? Then go down to south London and sign up for school. Yes, children that misbehave are being given foot massages to calm them down. That just sounds like an incentive to me. I promise not to be noisy at work if I get a foot massage once a week :)

Like lambs? A lot? Want to watch them via webcam all day long, give them a name, and get regular photos? Then pop over to Sacramenia in Spain and sign up now. Or see a therapist. Or both, for that matter...

A man who robbed a bank wearing a dayglo vest, safety goggles, a dust mask, and a blue shirt and was able to escape by a large crowd of similarly dressed people gathering outside has finally been caught. He had recruited the others on Craigslist, none of which had any idea that they were being used as a decoy for the police. One has to marvel at how the internet can help every area of our lives...

Fan of Star Wars? Wanted to show everyone that you are the number one? Well hurry along and buy the all new Darth Vader toaster. Yes, you can now produce your very own pieces of toast with the image of the man himself burnt into them. Definitely a must-have for Christmas :)

Want an interesting court case? How about one where someone strips off to prove his point? Well that's what's going to happen in January...

Stay well covered...

2008-10-26T17:09:00.002Z

Bookfairs, Fartgas and other health dangers

The Frankfurt bookfair ended last weekend. For those of you that don't know the little secrets, go on the last day (a Sunday) and make your way to the International Halls 8 (English) and 5.1 (Hispanic/Italian). Here you will find many publishers and country representatives selling off their books at a very good discount rather than pack them into their bags and fly them back home.
Getting the RMV Kombi-Ticket is also a good tip, as it includes the transport links to and from the fair and covers Mainz.

During the Second World War, various encoding machines were built to hide the confidential military messages that needed to be sent. In Germany they used the Enigma machines, which were duly cracked by a team in Bletchley Park in the UK with the Enigma machine. Maybe you knew that. What is a lot less known is that Germany also sold the commercial (weaker) version of these machines to Franco in Spain. These were successful at keeping the messages secret from the republicans, but what Franco probably did not know, was that the British were able to decipher his messages as well using their newly set up deciphering machine.
Now the Spanish have found 26 of these machines that belonged to Franco and are in full working order. Maybe they could send them off to Bletchley Park to help raise funds for the Museum...

Nothing could be more sacred than our non-metric measurements, afternoon tea (with those little triangular cucumber sandwiches) and the talking clock. When students go out partying in their first year away from home, this is what they wake up to in the morning after having dialled it and left their phone connected all night. Then comes the phone bill to confirm it, just in case they don't believe that it really happened to them. Well this age old tradition is now being gimmicked up with sponsorship from Disney. Yes, Tinkerbell will now be telling you in dulcet tones what hour of the day it is (and probably strongly suggesting you go and see her new film...)
What next? Big Ben sponsored by Nokia, having the SMS ring tones coming up every hour? Or even worse, the Crazy Frog one...

A woman in Japan has been put in jail after virtually murdering her virtual husband. She was not, however, put away for the virtual murder itself, rather for the stealing of the other gamer's login credentials. It's amazing what headlines one can get out of a story like that though...

Stink bombs smell bad. We all know that, that's why they sell. What we didn't know until now was that they also can help to control blood pressure. Yes, you read that correctly. So next time you smell an odour in the air, take a deep whiff (and prey that it was in fact a stink bomb and not the real thing...)

Keep sniffing...

2008-10-19T09:48:00.002Z

Micha Visit, Tough Deodorants, No Known Abode

Faces from the past - Micha came over to Mainz yesterday as he was in Frankfurt for the book festival. The usual Eisgrub meeting went ahead (Carlitos, Luigi, Fidel, Mamen, Ali, Olgui were all present), lots of beer flowed and not many people are able to get up this morning.

Ever wanted to let someone know that maybe they need to cover up their odours? Look no further than Wal-Mart in Canada. They have the real thing, and that's for sure - check it out.

A legal case being brought against God has been dismissed, but not quite for the reason one would expect. It was agreed that He does exist, and therefore can be sued. However, as He is of no fixed abode it is impossible to serve him the papers for a court appearance.

Spare a thought for the San Cayetano Football Club from Peru. After losing their game 10-0, their bus was forced over the edge of a cliff by robbers and fell 600 feet killing 3 players and 2 of the owners...

Now it's off to the book festival to pick up some great bargains...

2008-10-12T16:04:00.002Z

Weddings Galore and Animals in Need

Again there was a wedding of close friends here in Germany. Friedi and Marc tied the knot on Friday, with food and drink being served soon after, and not stopping until about midnight. Of course, this being Germany, we have the church wedding to look forward to next year as well :)
And again in Valencia two souls joined together and got hitched. And both of them wore dresses (you can decide who looked better in them). So the wee lass Angie and her now husband Jose (Marques to the rest of us) partied on down and exchanged rings also this weekend.
May both couples celebrate many more (years together - not weddings) and remember these moments just as long.

Ever seen a blue pig? Not likely. Well, the fire brigade in Derbyshire did when they rescued a pig out of the canal on a cold night. It has yet to be confirmed what it was doing in there (rumours say the backstroke).

After a sheep refused to budge from a Welsh motorway last week, police took out their tasers and gave it an electric shock. People stood in disbelief, wondering where this trigger-happiness came from. Well, at least it wasn't a real gun, otherwise there would be mutton stew on the menus in the local restaurant...

School kids, so innocent aren't they? Well think again if one of them decides to offer you some fresh home-made muffins. They may not be all that innocent as two teachers found out after being taken to hospital after ingesting the cannabis they were baked with...

So, weather's messing about again. At least it was good for the wedding.

Keep those animals on a leash...

2008-09-27T13:26:00.002Z

Jedi Degree, Red Light Gallery and Last of Grange Hill

Want to learn how to be a Jedi? Then sign up to the Belfast University one-day course starting in November. Just remember not to go over to the dark side...

Something like nostalgia came back when I heard that the BBC tv-series Grange Hill has shown its last episode. This is a series that's been going on since I was at primary school. Despite not having watched it for probably 18 years, it's intro music always gets stuck in your head when you think about it. Lets hope whatever they use to replace it is also memorable enough (for good reasons).

Want to see the 'sights' of Amsterdam without actually crossing the channel? Then head down to the national gallery, where an exhibition of the red light district is currently being shown (no, they're not real people in the windows...).

For those broccoli lovers out there (yes, Olga, that's you :) take heart in the fact that research now suggests that eating this vegetable helps your lungs against serious diseases. Put that together with the research from not long ago that broccoli also protects you against diabetes effects on blood vessels. So get some of it on your plate now !

As the world championship of conkers gets underway, a health and safety office has decided to back the event in order to show they don't want to be spoilsports in such fun and games. So get your conkers in the oven, the vinegar out, and thread those strings through.

As the preparations for the tailgating in Ann Arbor get underway, let's see if a miracle can happen, and Michigan can actually win...

Eat your greens...

2008-09-12T08:35:00.002Z

Importance of Online News Sites, French Big Sister, and More Para-Golds

So nobody really reads news stories online, you say? Well, due to a 6-year-old story about United Airlines appearing on the Google News Site this week, United's share prices fell 75% !!! Obviously someone important was reading that story...

I couldn't believe what I was reading in this article on the Register which tells about a database of French people being created of anyone likely to cause trouble. This list includes politicians, businessmen, trade unionists etc. Apparently it will be converged with the new biometric ID cards in France, in order to have a complete picture of anyone that might at some point become interesting...sounds like the UK version gone awry...

So you're not quite following the Tour de France since Armstrong left it in 2005? Pack you yellow jersey and book your flights, he's coming back out of retirement for the 2009 race. Let's see if the sport gets an image boost through this...

The Olympics might have been a triumph for the UK, but the Paralympics are becoming a dream. Great Britain is currently in second place to China, with a total of 61 medals (29 of them gold). Well done team GB !!

Can't wait for 2012...

2008-09-07T15:00:00.002Z

Weddings, Drugs and a Lump of Sugar

Yesterday was a special day. Yes, Britta and Johannes got married in Darmstadt (after 10 years of being together) to the delight of many children. The drinks flowed, the sketches were hilarious, and fun was had by all.
In another city in another country, another couple also got married. After nearly as many years together, Alberto (Albakra) and Sofia tied the knot in Valencia.
So to both couples congratulations are sent out, and may they celebrate many happy years more.

The latest sporting drugs scandal has been declared. No, not in cycling, nor in running, but in Sumo wrestling. Yes, no longer can you assume that those hefty sportsmen are so dedicated to their sport, as a number were found to have been taking marijuana. Yep, steroids are not needed for this sport, they obviously need to relax after a sweat-filed game...

Another unbelievable story is that of an elephant in China that was recovered from illegal traders and found to be having withdrawal symptoms. Apparently the traders had been feeding it with heroin-injected bananas. After a spell in rehab, it seems like it has been cured of it's addiction, and now only requests clean bananas hand-picked by girls dressed in hula-hula dresses...

The Czech government has come into controversy after a new PR campaign to let it's inhabitants know about its forthcoming presidency of the EU. It used a saying about making the EU sweeter with a lump of sugar which also means to make it taste it's own medicine apparently. There are no translation problems to blame, those are the two meanings in the Czech language. The questions for the president are flooding in...

And after having made it to forth place in the Beijing Olympics, Great Britain is now leading the board in the Paralympics with 4 gold medals after only one day. Let's wish them all the best for the rest of the Games...

Sixteen years is a long time in politics. Especially when there are no democratic elections.
Well after that amount of time without, Angola has just held it's parliamentary elections which observers say seemed to be fair. Let's hope the African Nation picks up it's pieces after the civil war and manages to make the best use of all its natural resources.

Back to the autumn...

2008-08-31T08:38:00.003Z

Open Skies, Joss-stick risk, getting wetless, and Portsmouth Posters

Research suggests that the use of Joss-sticks and incense increase the risk of cancer. So are we now going to see catholic churches putting up hazard signs at the entrances? Don't hold your breath...

A British company has found a method to make any material 100% waterproof. Expect to see beach-laptops, paper drinking glasses and shoes that actually stay dry inside...

Portsmouth Dockyards have been doing a promotional poster campaign recently that has had some unusual side effects. Just take a look at the posters, think of those sailors alone at sea for so long, and then have a laugh...

Ever seen sheep crossing the London bridge? If not, hold on to your hats, as a woman who was made freeman of the city will use her right to do this to help promote fundraising for Kent cathedral. As far as I know the law still exists that if a gentleman wishes to take a leek in the city, he may ask a policeman to shield him with his cloak. I wonder if anyone is going to try and exercise that right...

And finally we can now cook in peace. Yes, the hind-quarter showing, no-longer-breathing, sky-light-blocking bird has now been removed. What a relief.

And now the wine festival in Mainz is coming to a close, so make a last ditch attempt to see it whilst you can today...

2008-08-24T11:52:00.003Z

Bird on Top

Not to make this predictable, you may notice there is only one headline today. But you'll have to read through the other news before you find out why. Oh, hold on, you don't, you just have to scroll...another reason why the internet spoils things for us.

For any of you wishing to read raunchy versions of the Belgian hero Tintin, you'll have to go back to hunting on ebay, as the latest comic strip "The pink lotus" has had to be pulled from the shelves after complaints.

Want to bump up your bra size a bit? Boyfriend ever get thirsty while out on the town? Then this new device is for you. It's a bra with inflatable/fillable bags inside, connected with a tube. The idea is to fill it up to the top with you tipple of choice (nearly a Freudian slip there), allowing you to strut you larger stuff around and as soon as said friend gets thirsty, he just takes a swig from the tube. I see a possible different use to this. How about needing the loo, and the ladies' queue is miles long? Then just fill up said tube in a dark corner and keep on partying! How about when the bags are empty (either not having been yet, or the drink's already been finished). Then why not just blow it up a few sizes? One might want to check for leaks though...

Notting Hill Carnival is on again this bank holiday weekend. Yes, get out your colourful clothing, and get down to London to party the day away whilst eating such specialities as jerk chicken and curry goat. In fact the history of the carnival, the riots and the race relations act is very interesting as well. Take a look at it here. If you want the lowdown of what is eaten on such an occasion, then check out the official site here.

Now onto the birds. One would assume that despite strong rainfalls, birds generally are able to protect themselves, hide under shelter, or just make sure they are well pruned with enough grease on their feathers. But then something has to happen to prove you wrong. So whilst Sara and Tati were going through the pasta and wine dinner chez moi, we heard a big thump. On looking up we can see a pigeon's hind quarters just popping over the sky-light window. Upon winding up and down the window a few times we came to realise that is wasn't just perched there, but fell out of the sky and landed there. So now whilst I'm cooking I can look up and see a dead bird's backside. How appetising...

Bon appetite...

2008-08-16T08:28:00.002Z

Madge Birthday, America under Google Attack, London Crime

Today marks the 50th birthday of Madonna. To see a brief summary of her career check out the bbc link here. Happy Birthday !

Most of you know of Google Maps. It is used in reference in many other sites as a reliable way of mapping something that's happened. Well after Georgia was attacked by Russia this week, many people turned to this page to check out what was going on. They were astonished to see that the news article brought up a link to the American state of Georgia. Thankfully Bush did not order an attack on Russia as a result of this. Just goes to show how computer intelligence is still no match for a good brain...

Wanting to buy a house in London? Maybe just planning a trip around the city on your own? Well the metropolitan police department have created a crime map (yes, based on Google Maps...) to show you which areas have higher than average crime rates, so you can avoid those hotspot areas. Just make sure it is London, UK before you pay for anything...

And finally, anyone around Alicante today should try to pop by Alberto's abode. Here is where Albakra's stag party is taking place tonight. Let's hope the beer flows, the strippers dance, and no-one gets interviewed...

Have one on me...