Spring

The weather's getting better, the Fallas have come and gone, the clocks have been put forward and april fools day has passed. This can only mean one thing, we're in spring !

Now onto the news.
Carrying on the important scientific research programme, sheep have been found to have best friends. Amongst them, however is unlikely to be the local butcher.

In a move which is bound to have ramifications for Ibiza tourists and Ann Summers saleswomen, California has prosecuted a wheelchair-bound 87 year old man for wanting to fly to the philipines to have sex with young girls. Authorites were alerted to his intentions when they found child pornography, sex aids, sexually explicit letters to the two girls and 45kg of chocolate in his bags. Obviously next time he should try not to go over the weight limit for his luggage with so much chocolate...

In an announcement that will produce a manifold of "I told you so" cries, a biotech company has apparently been selling non-approved genetically modifed seeds for the last four years. Makes you just feel safe, doesn't it...

Striking at the heart of those wife-swappers amongst you, police in Korea have arrested more than 150 people that apparently indulged in such activities. Partners were apparently graded on how much they participated in the group sex videos that they posted online (450 having signed up for "lifetime" membership)...

Following in the footsteps of Richard Branson, a young 18 year old from Oxford has opened up his own airline to fly people between Oxford and Cambridge. No longer do you have to arrive in a "normal" bus, you can arrive in style in your own light aircraft.

Next time you go out walking alone in London, be on the lookout for a great big cat, after a man was attacked by said animal. Zoo experts have been consulted...

After announcing his intention to stand for election in Peru, Fujimori has started his campaign trail by selling a cola drink named "Fuji-Cola" in order to earn enough money for the rest of his campaign. Well, at least there's hope that other big cola manufacturers could put him out of business before he gets too far...

Like a phoenix, from a pet-shop fire that killed 150 other animals, only one turtle survived. This creature, however has an evil side. On it's shell is burnt the image of satan. Just have a look at the picture. What use a turtle would be for world domination, I don't know, but I'm sure we'll find out...

For those of you who remember Kylie before she sang, and have ever heard of Jason Donavon, would have the australian soap opera "Neighbours" to thank. Well, this series that every schoolkid in the UK can remember for the famous wedding of the aforementioned two people, has reached it's second decade. Yes, that's right, 20 years of it!! Of course, what's now happening in it I haven't got the foggiest (maybe Des and Daphne returned) but it just goes to show it's still as popular as ever.

Got a new phone? Has it got MMS? want to know what this technology gives you? Well, read this article about what these new fangled camera-phones are actually being used for...

Think the second world war is history? Well, apparently not. An ex-Nazi medic who set himself up in Chile has apparently being forcing women to wear aprons, men to wear lederhosen, the genders to be seperated, and sexually abusing young boys. And all that at the ripe old age of eighty-something. There's no stopping some people...

Being detained isn't the same as it used to be! 108 people in US custody in Iraq and Afghanistan have now died. The battlefield within...

And to round up this week's news, it has been found that fish can use their bubbles to communicate. So next time you see a herring letting off a bit off gas, don't give it a hard time, just listen and learn :)

That's it for now