Celebrity Hitmen, PC Nursery Rhymes, and Messed Up Monkeys

So you are doing a show of murders that are happening in your city. Things are a bit slow. What do you do? Well, this Brazilian TV host decided to set about ordering killings which just happened to be his rivals in the drug trade. I wonder if one should start investigating Crimewatch...

Political 'correctness' is coming into the BBC now, where they've just made the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme have a happy ending. Isn't there any topic that doesn't end up being savaged by such political nonsense?

Fifteen years ago, pregnant monkeys were given cocaine. Now their middle-aged children are showing the effects. The male monkeys that were inside the womb at the time of the drug intake are impatient, and have no self control. I suppose the female monkeys were like this at this age anyway, which is why they didn't notice a difference...

Keep those monkeys happy...